Category: Oneness Pentecostal | Page 26

Returning to Abuse? A Dog Returns to it’s Vomit

It’s 3:15am as I write this article. I woke in the night thinking about this topic as it’s been on my mind for some time, maybe months. To be honest with you though, I went to bed really early, like 7pm so I got plenty of sleep. I don’t want you thinking I’m sleep-typing!

I’m writing about this topic because I have to. Something in me is driven to expose the wrongdoings of manipulative people in places of spiritual authority and power. I could certainly write about cool places in the world and get more likes, but it’s about the information, not the popularity to me.

Between this blog, my YouTube channel and several social media support groups I participate in, plus hundreds of hours of reading books and watching videos, I’ve learned something very powerful by listening to hundreds of people: Spiritual abuse affects the mind in exactly the same way physical and sexual abuse does.

The victim is tricked into believing “I need this, even if it hurts, is uncomfortable and people are warning me otherwise!”

Like a dog that returns to his vomit Is a fool who repeats his foolishness. – Proverbs 26:11, AMP

The Cycle of Abuse

I don’t mention it often anymore, but I left what is considered by most of the world, both religious and academic, to be a cult. It is a modern Christian church that uses a parcel of truth, a pinch of authenticity and a sprinkle of love to create a system of dependency upon the leadership of the church rather than Christ – and it works, really well sad to say. Our loyalty was to the leader. We believed his pleasure was equal to God’s pleasure. If the leader said jump, it was as if Jesus said jump, and we jumped. Boy did we jump!

This system taught that you were unable to succeed in your Christian walk without this man. We went to church nearly 200x a year (three services every week plus special times through the year) and it was ingrained into us that if we missed one of those services, Satan was beginning to work in our lives.

We were taught that this one pastor was the umbrella of protection against God’s wrath and against Satan’s snares. His[Pastor] words were HIS[Jesus] words. His[Pastor] standards were HIS[Jesus] commands. There was no leading ‘of the spirit.’ That was the Pastor’s job. The pastor taught, “If God has something for you, he will confirm it in me.”

In other words, you need this. You need this man to be under God’s blessings. You need this one individual person to succeed in life. If you get out of this persons control and things start to happen in your life that are uncomfortable, you’ll begin to think it is your fault, if you would just have listened to that person this wouldn’t be happening…

The effect is like a “pendulum of pain,” said Steven Stosny, counselor and founder of the anger and violence management program CompassionPower, which treats people convicted of abuse in the home.

Abuse victims will “leave out of either fear, anger or resentment,” he said. “But then, after the fear, anger or resentment begins to subside, they feel guilt, shame, anxiety, and that takes them back.”

Just waiting for the curses to begin…

Vomiting is a natural reaction of the body and it is usually caused by ingesting something your body rejects, something poisonous or contaminated. We hear all the time about food poisoning, eating food that is expired and harmful for consumption. If your body didn’t naturally dispose of that poison it would spread into your other areas and cause more disruption and perhaps damage.

There is something about the spirit that God gave us that behaves in much the same way. It is that sixth sense we talk about. That ‘something’ you can’t quite put a finger on but you know it is there. An internal discontent, a small still voice.

Admittedly, this was me in the months after I left the cult. I was literally waiting, daily, for the curses to begin. I stopped paying the church the 15% of my income they demanded and I was sure any day I’d get fired, the car would blow up, something major was going to come crashing down as proof that I’d really screwed up. But it didn’t.

As tension builds up in a situation of abuse, we are preparing to vomit, and like all of us, we swallow and drink water, focus, and concentrate, do everything we can to make it NOT happen. It is so uncomfortable I would rather NOT vomit, even though vomiting will get the yuck out. And just like the Cycle of Abuse chart – that tension rises until finally, the incident happens.

It comes out, the anger spills forth, we spit out what has been troubling us for so long and some of us take the leap and leave the abusive situation. The cult, the abuser. And then, fear kicks in.

What if he was right…what if God is going to curse me now that I left? What if my flat tire was God saying Hello! What are you doing? What if my bad financial choices were God pulling the strings and spanking me for not giving my money to the pastor? What if…I’ve got to go back!

And this is where the dog returns to his folly as Proverbs 26:11 says. In fact, the entire chapter is about folly. The ingestion of things unsettling and poisonous is ignored, swallowed down and chased with a good shot of coverup hugs and celebration.

This phase always feels good – while distrust sits in the back of everyone’s mind, the kiss and makeup phase is fun – ask any long-term couple. The euphoric makeup scene always comes after great conflict or a fight.

The final phase of abuse settles in – the calm before the storm. The one benefit any counselor has in watching people return to abuse is knowing that the cycle restarts, and as painful as it is to watch, the great hope is that somewhere between cycles it becomes too much and the victim makes their final escape.

It is in this phase where the returning victim claims there was never any abuse. It was a misunderstanding. Sadly, we’ll even hear them say, It was all me, I got confused, I made stuff up, I let other people blind me to the love that he really has for me.

This is where the abuser smiles, extends love, makes promises, opens up. They will say things like, “I just held out hope you would come back and look, God answered my prayers!” or “You felt it, you know this is right!” Pretty, enticing words that don’t actually cover up anything of what happened before – it just tickles the euphoric senses of the dog returning to its folly. The comfortable kennel that smells like it always did. The blanket is matted in just the same spots. It feels secure. The treats are just the same bacon flavored Kibbles and Bits as before. It feels like home…

Until one day…

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One Victim’s Voice Brought Down a UPC Pedophile

Part twelve of a series of articles on the United Pentecostal Church and sex abuse.

In doing recent investigation on sexual abuse cases for this series of articles, I am reminded of an especially sick case involving a former United Pentecostal Church pastor in Alabama, Mack Charles Andrews. He was licensed from 1987 though 2000 and during that time was pastor of a UPC church in Thomasville. For some of this time he also held the position of Conqueror’s Secretary of the Alabama District. In 2013 he was arrested on multiple counts of rape, sodomy and sexual torture involving four children during the 1980s and 1990s at the church and its school, Faith Christian Academy. In addition, there were also victims whose cases were not included in the criminal counts against him, some who were willing to testify. On the day his trial was to start, he plead guilty and under the plea agreement was sentenced to only 15 years in prison.

At one point in 2015, an investigator had spoken to eleven victims and believed there were more. Some of the victims hired attorneys in an effort to keep him from speaking with them. There were church members who were still supportive of Andrews, some not even seeming to consider the possibility of his guilt. Investigator David Conner was quoted as saying, “I’ve had members of the church try to bail him out of jail. Some wouldn’t even entertain the thought that he might have done it. He is a master of manipulating people and, for lack of a better word, brain-washing them. …The hold he has on the community is still evident.”

This mindset sounds similar to what I have been hearing about a UPC church in Colorado, where there are allegations that the pastor failed to report several cases of sexual abuse. Many people there, both former and current members, have witnessed incidents that were not right and have knowledge that things were not reported to police which should have been. Many yet have a fear of this pastor and his family and it has been alleged they have threatened to sue people with whom they are unhappy or have tossed out of the church. While such a fear remains and people do not speak out and come forward, it leaves the door open for similar to continue.

The people of his old church congregation have all turned against me. In there blindness of the Truth they blame it on me because I came forth finally and told the truth. I haven’t been a member of his church in 20 years. But, until the point of me telling the police my story I still considered some of them friends. I know better now. It’s funny to me how people who so radically claim their salvation have shown no love of Christ to me or any other victims in this case. The really wild thing is some of those congregants are actually victims themselves. Yet, their rage against me is strong and venomous. – Donna ‘Shay’ Smith, survivor of childhood sexual abuse

In the Andrews case, it took just one woman coming forward who was victimized from age seven through twelve. Because she went to police and shared the names of others she knew who had been abused, it enabled the police to dig into his history and find many of the victims, some of whom had kept it all inside. It put a pedophile in jail where there is no chance of him hurting other children while he serves his sentence. When he gets released, he will have to register as a sex offender, alerting the community that children are not safe around him. It brought some sense of justice to the survivors.

Had Donna ‘Shay’ Smith remained silent, this would not have happened and he would be at liberty to continue to bring untold devastation to the lives of others. Often times all it takes is for one person to be willing to come forward and tell their story. We have seen that recently with Debbie in Wisconsin, where once she started openly writing about her childhood sexual abuse by Steven J. Dahl, several other women from the very same church contacted her. If you are a survivor of sexual abuse, you do have a voice and you can make a difference. Your voice could be the one that helps prevent another child or adult from becoming a victim.

UPDATE May 20-26, 2021: Unfortunately in May 2021 Mack Charles Andrews was released from prison early. Shay shares her thoughts on this in the following video. See also this May 21, 2021 article from AL.com about his release as well as Newsweek’s May 21 article. On May 24 the NY Post released an article and on May 25, WFLA covered the story. His name also now shows in the sex offender registry.

Investigator David Connor shares his thoughts on Mack Charles Andrews in the following video.

You will find a complete list of articles in this series by clicking here.

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Enabling Environments in UPC Youth Groups

Part eleven of a series of articles.

This addresses the co-mingling of those underage with ones in their twenties and thirties in some churches. Years back, the Youth Division of the UPCI was called Pentecostal Conquerors. (2024: The original linked to video was later made private and I have replaced it with a different one.) The national leader could be as old as 39, while district officers could be 35. Their churches allowed those from 12 to 35 to take part together in various activities.

I feel that encouraging those in their twenties and thirties to hang with pre-teens and young teenagers has opened the door for grooming and sexual assaults of minors to occur. Debbie has shared that the church in Madison didn’t seem to think there was anything inappropriate or potentially troublesome with people much older hanging around with those quite younger. Debbie was groomed and repeatedly assaulted from age eleven to twelve by a man who was old enough to be her father. The church didn’t blink, even when he took her on day long work trips.

The following article is what one person has observed in this environment and was written by a woman who wishes to remain anonymous.

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I came into the UPC at 26 years of age. I had been out of church for about ten years, living a very worldly life, even by most liberal church’s standards. I look back now and count this life experience as a blessing, as I could see warning flags where many of the young people in the United Pentecostal Church could not. I had grown up in pretty average churches, and I had adored youth group in high school. I was used to youth group being for kids grades 8-12, with possibly a handful of older “young people” volunteering as leaders. Usually these leaders were part of the C&C (College and Career), they weren’t any older than early 20s, and they were Godly examples, leading solid, mature spiritual lives.

I was delighted when I was “invited” to attend my new church’s Hyphen group! I do recall wondering why it took them several months to ask me to attend, and why it wasn’t just published on their website or ever announced. I would have thought they would want everyone even visiting to know about it. I remember also being flattered they thought I was so young, and then surprised when they said it was for ages 18-35. I had thought that was quite a spread of ages. I look back now and I guess they didn’t want to advertise it at that age spread as it might have not looked so good on paper, and it would have held them more responsible for some of the things that did go on in regards to Hyphen and youth.

The first evening I showed up for the group, we had planned to play basketball and then have a short Bible study. I was still quite new, so I couldn’t figure out why the only other two girls to show up both wore skirts to play basketball. The group was mainly guys, mostly in their mid 20s. The other two girls didn’t really play ball, largely because of their apparel. In the subsequent weeks, the other two girls didn’t attend often. They both had rotating shift work and they also said it wasn’t fun if all the girls weren’t able to attend. I soon learned the holiness standards and started to see a real issue with attending these athletic evenings, as if I dressed how they preached, I would struggle to play things like basketball or soccer while remaining modest and keeping my skirt from getting pulled, twisted or flipped up. If I didn’t play, chances are I would be sitting on the sidelines alone as the other two girls weren’t often there. If I dressed to play sports, then I would look backslidden. I settled into a routine with the church where I spent my time with the older women and skipped Hyphen. Hyphen became an all boys club for a time.

The church had a small youth group but it was growing. The youth pastor was one of the guys in the Hyphen group. He usually used a couple of the other guys from the group as leaders. Because Hyphen was a small group, he regularly would combine the Hyphen/Youth activity so he only had to lead one group that week. Hyphen was still all male at that point in time, while youth was primarily female, with girls ranging from 12-17. One of those girls ended up marrying the youth pastor, as soon as she graduated from high school at 18. He was about ten years her senior and had known her since she was ten or eleven. I was around his age at the time and remember finding it kind of gross to think he watched her grow up and married her as soon as it could sort of be considered socially acceptable. I wondered if he just suddenly found an interest in her, or if he had been perving on her when she was 14 or 16, while he was her youth pastor. Another girl, same age, and the same year, also married that summer out of high school to a man from another church who was also in his mid to late 20s. I thought they must be anomalies at the time. Later I realized this was the norm.

Around that point in time, there was a number of new people to the church and the pastor couldn’t keep up on all the Bible studies and discipleship classes he had on the go. He sent one of his more difficult students to the youth pastor to mentor. I knew this 53 year old man from outside of the church. He had been a member of our local chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous for some time. He had been able to maintain sobriety from both drugs and alcohol, but he had a lot of mental health, and emotional issues.

He would argue with everything the pastor said, and he had a real hang up on what the Bible said about sex. He would argue with our pastor about God not actually expecting abstinence, he refusal to live chaste, and he had strong opinions on a myriad of other male topics in regards to sex. He had been my house mate at one point when I wasn’t attending the UPC church, and I had the misfortune of finding his adult magazines lying around the house, as well as literally walking in on him in the living room with his pants down. I knew he had a real problem in this area. In fact, all the women in AA knew he had a problem in this area. He was very friendly and overbearing with all ages of women in AA and he would harass and show up in the same places as the women he was interested in at the time. I was glad to hear he was so open with the pastor about his feelings in this area, as he really needed a Godly man to hash these things out with, and not the poor women in AA.

After the pastor passed along this man to the youth pastor to mentor, this man was nearly inseparable from the youth pastor. They hung out several nights a week. They hung out at church. Where one was, the other one was. I remember thinking it was odd that a 28 year old life time Christian man, and a virgin, would have much in common with this 53 year old man who wasn’t overly committed to a Christian walk and who had such an obsession with sex. I was uncomfortable when this man started attending Hyphen. It was one more reason I didn’t want to attend. I was horrified when I found how he was attending Hyphen/Youth. Why would a 53 year old man want to hang around with teens and twenty somethings? Why would he want to be around underage girls?!?! Why was anyone letting him be around under age girls!?!?

This guy had a reputation for being very pushy and not respecting boundaries with women his own age. He also had a bad temper. He got into a fight with one of my close friends because she turned him down. He told her all the reasons he was better than the men she had been dating and why she HAD to date him. He bullied her and yelled at her and wouldn’t leave her alone. She was a very strong woman, but I knew many women would have caved and gone out with him just to settle him down. And they were allowing him around very young, vulnerable women? What if he decided he was the best dating choice for one of the 18, 19, or even 22 year old women? I knew the pastor wouldn’t listen to me if I said anything though, so I fretted in silence.

A new, young girl, started attending the youth group. She was 15. She came from a pretty broken home. She had actually been invited to the youth group in the most ingenious of ways. She had developed a pretty serious crush on one of her classmates, who happened to be a young boy from our church. She was following him around school and giving him gifts and notes. He went to his mother, looking for advice as he wasn’t interested in this worldly girl with a reputation for partying.

The mom decided she found a witnessing opportunity. She started inviting the girl to their home for family dinner and then brought her to the youth group when she brought her three sons. The girl continued to crush on the boy, but she did it while hanging out with a group of Christian girls, learning about God. Eventually the girl became more independent of the boy’s mother and she started getting rides with other members of youth or Hyphen, and she also hung out with the group at non official gatherings at people’s homes or McDonalds.

I was so concerned to hear that the 53 year old man had become her regular ride. He didn’t work, and had no problem driving her from anywhere to anywhere as he appreciated the company and wasn’t doing anything anyways. She was starved for attention in life and she would go to anyone looking for attention, love, etc. She was so vulnerable as she told him about her drug experiments at parties. They could bond over their shared substance abuse stories. She confessed her confusion over an attraction to women to him and wanted to discuss what the Bible had to say. They could bond over their dislike for God’s plan for husband and wife. She discussed modesty as per how the UPC preached it. They could bond over their shared desire for women to wear what they wanted and the innocence in a little cleavage and leg. She had no curfew; he had no reason to be up early in the morning. They would end up in an after hours dinner having deep discussions late in to the night. The youth pastor knew, but if anything, I think he was just glad someone other than him was amusing this man on those nights.

Something I’ve learned in my own life. There are many male predators that don’t set out to be a predator. They just don’t have boundaries. A healthy, normal man of 53 years of age wouldn’t want to hang out with a bunch of young people because he doesn’t have anything in common with them. If he was a leader to them, he would maintain a certain distance as he is twice their age. A normal, healthy man of 53 years of age would not allow himself to get pulled into deep conversations with a 15 year old girl, because he would know its not appropriate and its not healthy for her. A man with boundaries, certainly wouldn’t start confiding in this 15 year old girl, while discussing the Bible and what it says about sex.

This man was one of those predators that didn’t set out to be a predator. I don’t know if anything ever happened with them, I would like to believe it didn’t. But they had both put themselves in a very precarious place. She was latching on to a daddy figure, but she was just a mixed up kid. He was allowing himself to get very emotionally involved with a minor. If she had made a pass at him, I truly believe he would have gone with it. The legal age of consent in our area is 14, and he would have deluded himself into believing it was ok since she was older than 14.

I look back at that group of kids now. The kids that came from church families have stayed in the church. The kids that were new have not stayed in the church. Facebook told me recently that a girl who had just entered youth when I was attending Hyphen, married one of those men from Hyphen as soon as she graduated at age 18. He was 30. He had known her since she was a preteen. She is now pregnant and will be giving birth at 19.
The church looks at the girls that left as backslidden and headed for hell.

Some of the girls are just wearing pants and make-up. One is living with her boyfriend. Another is in a lesbian relationship. Instagram has gotten at least one of those girls in trouble with her mom after photos of underage drinking came out. None of these girls have made terrible, life ending decisions. They are just going through some of the stages or rebellions of growing up. I look at the girl who is pregnant at 18. She is the only one of the group with a teenage pregnancy, even if she is married. She is still just a kid herself. These other girls living outside of the church haven’t made any decisions that will alter their lives in big ways. This girl soon will be responsible for another little life, while shackled to someone who has 12 years of adulting experience over her. I find it so sad.

These girls aren’t protected from being exploited and they aren’t allowed to be kids with other kids. They are put together with men twice their age, and are expected to be mature and pure, and would be held responsible if anything were to occur. In a church culture where the older men marry the young women after watching them grow up, no one is concerned in protecting these girls.

You will find a complete list of articles in this series by clicking here.

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Is Your Faith Being Hijacked By Controlling Leaders?

Have you ever asked yourself ‘How did I end up here? What choices did I make that brought me to this moment?’ You might have asked this about your marriage, your job, some circumstance in your life that when you got there – it left you bewildered and confused. It felt like it was out of your control – like you were a puppet and the one pulling the strings was a hijacker – it doesn’t feel like it was you.

This is something I’ve heard many times about faith and spiritually abusive church structures – that it (faith) was taken over by controlling spiritual leaders who directly manipulated the steps taken by an individual, who then face a moment in time when their faith is in crisis. I’ve even asked the question, “Am I really a Christian (follower of Christ) if everything I do is the dictates of another flawed human being?”

One pastor told a young man, “Until I feel your unwavering loyalty, I will not give you one of my girls.”

To put this into context – the young man had asked the pastor of the church he attended for permission to marry another young lady in the church. The first and immediate response is that it isn’t the pastors choice – but in a system that hijacks your faith, they teach that it is the pastors choice.

In this scenario, the pastor simultaneously claimed ownership of a young lady, who was not his daughter, and claimed control over the actions and future of a young man in the church. The Bible says that we are to be led by the Spirit (Romans 8:14) and that when we need wisdom we are to ask God for it. (James 1:5)

More importantly, a Biblical command is to honor your father and mother (Exodus 20:12) and that in Bible terms, headship looks like this:

GOD
CHRIST
HUSBAND
WIFE
CHILDREN (presumably)

Ephesians 5:23

In the scenario of the young man and woman, the young man never spoke to his parents to seek permission to marry this young lady – and truthfully he didn’t need their permission, but following Biblical patterns would have given them much more authority in the matter. Instead, that process was hijacked by a controlling pastor.

How can your Faith be Hijacked?

I have now spoken with hundreds of people who have come out of or are coming out of spiritually abusive and controlling churches via this blog, my YouTube channel and social media groups, and the answers have been the same across the board – Fear.

Question: “What made you stay in that abusive relationship for so long?”

Everyone has identified with one or more of the following reasons.

Fear of being disfellowshipped
Fear of losing positions of ministry
Fear of losing rewards (such as permission to marry)
Fear of punishment
Fear of losing friends and family member relationships (yes this happens)
Fear of Salvation (You are told disobedience to the pastor is disobedience to God and is the sin of rebellion/witchcraft)

The list can actually continue on for quite a ways but fear is always the preeminent cause for an individual to stay in a controlling/abusive relationship. This is equally true for most physical, sexual, verbal and emotional abuse victims.

Over time, the control and abuse are normalized in the mind of the victim, even craved. Someone who lacks self-discipline may feel they need someone controlling their actions for them. That person is a prime target to be taken advantage.

For instance, the young man in our story had to choose between being controlled by a manipulator and agree to his terms in order to retain the love he felt for a young lady and marry, or reject being controlled and thereby lose the love of the young lady. (This is a true story in case you were wondering.) The choice was clear – obey my wishes or I take away something from you as punishment.

This is hijacked faith. Two young people should seek counsel in their choices, although they have no obligation to do so. Their parents and friends should be step #1 – and certainly seeking spiritual counsel is also wise – but none of those people have the right to say other individuals can or cannot get married.

The Tragedy of 9/11

In thinking back to the hijacking of four American planes on September 11th, 2001, where thousands of people had their lives hijacked by the evil will of others, I considered the connection between those events and hijacked faith.

When the passengers of those planes realized what was happening, they were left completely choice-less and powerless over their future. What was going to happen was out of their control – and while the initial thought is that someone in a spiritually abusive and hijacked situation has a choice, those people did not – you may be shocked to realize that that choice was mentally robbed from them (the young couple) every bit as much as the passengers on those planes.

When someone is convinced that heaven and hell are real and that their admission to one or the other is entirely defined by their obedience to the pastor, they are intellectually and emotionally robbed of free will and choice.

This takes time to be brainwashed into believing this – but just like our scenario with the young couple – she was so convinced of this she told the boy she would not marry him if he disobeyed the pastor. A husband told his wife, “Either we leave this church or there is a real possibility we won’t make it.” The wife responded, “Sorry, I’m not leaving the church.”

These people’s faith and future have been hijacked by terrorists, terrorist men or women who wear the clothes of a shepherd, which turns out to be a much better disguise than sheep’s clothing for the wolf.

Recovery

Just like real life hijacking events – the only way to recover is to overcome the force of the enemy – to bring to bear enough power and effort as to overwhelm those who would hijack your faith and future.

What does this mean for the Christian who is involved in an abusive church or religious organization? It means getting a firm understanding of who YOU really answer to!

Matthew 23 is one of the most powerful indicators of what our Lord Jesus Christ thought about men who would place themselves upon pedestals, take credit, demand obedience and authoritative respect. His response to those types of people was to proclaim to His disciples NOT to be like that.

Mat 23:8 But be not ye called Rabbi: for one is your Master, even Christ; and all ye are brethren. Mat 23:9 And call no man your father upon the earth: for one is your Father, which is in heaven. Mat 23:10 Neither be ye called masters: for one is your Master, even Christ. Mat 23:11 But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant.

Jesus Christ is your father, your lord, and your master. Not another man, who is as equally flawed as you are. And before it enters into your mind that ‘Yea but God gave us Pastors and we are supposed to obey them’, read again Matthew 23:8-11. This was Jesus telling his Apostles (above Pastors in the food chain) ‘Neither be ye called masters.’

The word here for ‘master’ is the Greek kath-ayg-ay-trace (G2519 in Strongs Dictionary) which means guide, a teacher. Others use it as authority. Neither be ye called authorities.

1 Corinthians 11:1 Imitate me as I imitate Christ.

This was Paul saying to follow his faith, follow his example and I would remind you Paul never demanded ‘unwavering loyalty for the permission of marrying.’ Paul never used dictatorial control of his disciples. Rather, he expressed the love of Christ and knew he was answerable to Christ.

Paul went on to express what Biblical headship is, which gives us guidance as to who we are to be loyal to;

1Co 11:3 Now I want you to realize that the Messiah is the head of every man, and man is the head of the woman, and God is the head of the Messiah.

Recognize and realize that our obedience is to Christ, our Messiah, and savior! It is Him we must please and nowhere did Jesus say, ‘If you obey the commandments of men, you will be saved.” In fact, he said quite the opposite.

Mar 7:7 Their worship of me is worthless, because they teach human rules as doctrines.’

John 15:10 If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love.

Lastly, the commandments of Christ were quite specific – love the Lord your God, and love your neighbor. Paul told us in Galatians 6:2 “Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

What was it that Jesus did? He came to bear the burden of our sin. He gave himself for each of us and thus, he gave all Love to God and to his neighbors. If we do the same, we abide in Christ’ love and have the Father.

If we are obedient to Christ, we are obedient to God. Let no man deceive you and hijack your faith by the claim that you must be obedient to them! Paul asked people to follow him, he didn’t demand it. Any man who claims you cannot please God without first pleasing him is a robber of God’s grace and a hijacker of your faith! Do not let them, but put your faith in Christ and Christ alone.

Jesus Plus Nothing = Everything

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To Survivors of Sexual Abuse in the UPCI

Part ten of a series of articles.

I have fought back tears while hearing reports of sexual abuse, some of it happening for years. It is sickening to discover how older men manipulated and molested young girls and boys. It is enraging to hear how certain pastors have systematically covered up and not reported such cases. Hearing that minors who were molested were blamed by pastors or church members disgusts me. Watching current United Pentecostal Church members and friends of the perpetrators and pastors attempt to re-victimize people, call them liars, blame them in some way and claim wrong motives for telling what happened is maddening. It is mind boggling to see former UPCI minister Todd Ritchie state there is nothing wrong with a pedophile being a pastor and claiming persecution of the perpetrator because a survivor is speaking out. It is all heartbreaking, it is repulsive, it is infuriating, I struggle to find words adequate to describe it….and I am not a victim but simply someone hearing what has happened.

There are pastors who have sat on their thrones and helped to devastate the lives of countless people by instructing parents to not go to police, not provide professional counseling to survivors and in some cases they have made them confess before the church, as if they had anything to do with their assault. Fearing for their spiritual welfare, there are church members who hold these men in esteem and will not speak of what they have seen and heard, thus allowing the criminal behavior to continue. Pastors have allowed perpetrators to continue molesting an untold number of people due to handling situations ‘in house’ and failing to report cases to the authorities. At least one has made it appear that they took cases to police when they did no such thing.

Pastors have either hidden sexual abuse or sent people away without informing church members of what happened, so parents don’t know to check if their child(ren) may have also been a victim. Pastors have allowed some to obtain a UPCI license after having committed such a crime, or to retain one.

It is unbelievable, inexcusable, and reprehensible how some United Pentecostal Church ministers have handled instances of sexual abuse and infidelity. They have not only brought shame upon themselves and their loved ones, but also upon the churches, the organization, and even Christianity itself. It is no wonder that some walk away from a belief in God. These men should not hold the office of a pastor, nor should they be licensed by anyone, nor should they hold any church leadership position or be preaching. Their actions have proven themselves untrustworthy and unfit.

Those who were sexually abused in these churches need to file a police report. The Special Victims Units handle such cases. If the crime happened in Madison, Wisconsin, for example, the SVU has six detectives on staff or if it happened in Denver, the Major Crimes Division would investigate. Don’t be concerned with how long ago it occurred or if there are witnesses or evidence. It isn’t solely about whether or not they can prosecute, but there are other factors to be considered.

There may be the possibility of a civil suit against the perpetrator or the pastor/church. There are cases that involve the repeated deliberate cover up of sexual abuse by pastors. There may be other churches that have done so but are not yet openly known as people have not come forward. Recent history has shown that all it sometimes takes is one person to come forward and report their abuse and it gives other survivors the impetus to do likewise. Many times a person feels they are alone when there are actually others. That is how Debbie felt when she came forward but found there were many more from Calvary Gospel Church. Yet no one will know and things may never change if people remain silent and do not come forward.

Each case has its own unique factors as well as statute of limitations and those vary from state to state. If people do not file reports, then there is nothing on record. There is no chance that the authorities will go after these perpetrators, pastors and churches. There is no chance of helping other unknown survivors, nor potential future ones should they decide to report. Each reported case helps- even if your individual case can no longer be prosecuted.

In addition, you will have the satisfaction of trying to do something to put a stop to what has happened and may still be happening. You have a voice. Who knows who you could help by filing a report. It may be just what another woman or man needs in order to go forward with their case. If there has ever been a time in our country where people are paying attention to what all too many people have endured with sexual abuse and how it has been mishandled in churches, it is NOW.

In addition to filing a police report, if it was a currently licensed minister who abused you, or covered up sexual abuse, the United Pentecostal Church has a judicial procedure where a complaint may be filed against that minister. I encourage any of our readers who have personal knowledge of such wrongdoings to learn about the judicial procedure and seriously consider filing an official complaint if the minister yet holds license, no matter how long ago something happened.

If a complaint is not filed, you can pretty much be guaranteed that the UPCI will not address the matter. If a complaint is filed, there’s a chance that some type of action will be taken, even if it falls below what you would want done. In other words, if you know of wrongdoing by a minister and you choose to not file an official complaint, do not expect to see any action taken against that minister.

In 2024 significant changes were made to this procedure and child sexual abuse complaints will now be handled differently than other complaints. Individual districts in the UPCI will no longer handle these. To learn all the details about the judicial procedure, go here.

Speak up- for yourself and for others. There is power in numbers- let your voice be heard. People may have been silent in your assault and there may have been little to no help and you may have been shamed. Yet you have a powerful voice which has yet to be heard and that may make it easier for another survivor and perhaps help them to receive justice in our legal system, even if you cannot. People are watching and listening.

Will your voice be among those that shatter the silence surrounding sexual abuse and the United Pentecostal Church?

March 20, 2024 Note: I added information about the UPCI’s judicial procedure and checked links.

You will find a complete list of articles in this series by clicking here.

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