Entering in through the rickety doors of the old church building, streams of colored light pour in from the stained-glass windows as if to distract onlookers from the curling burgundy paint, peeling off the side wall near the doors. A frail, silver-haired gentleman in a modest suit welcomes the first-time visitors and directs them into the sanctuary. Inside the sizeable room resounds the hustle and bustle of ministers and musicians readying for the service to come: women’s feet pad across the floor, corralling their little ones into rows as men greet one another with firm handshakes before returning to their pews. Racing toward the pulpit, “Great American Hymns of the Faith” in hand, the song leader opens-up the morning service with a long-winded prayer. After saying, “Amen,” the middle-aged man instructs the congregation to open their dusty hymnals to page one hundred, “The Lily of the Valley.” Strong, thunderous male voices resonate across the room, bellowing out praises to Almighty God, a rumble that could even be felt outside. But something is amiss. Where are the women’s voices? Maybe the men lead in the first verse, and the women join in at the chorus? Or maybe they switch on the second? But the chorus comes and goes. The roar of the men’s echoing voices carries on through the second verse, the women still standing at their pews, eyes intensely glued to the words, merely swaying side to side as their husbands sing from across the room.
As the piano strikes the last chord, an elderly man hobbles over to the pulpit, placing his black, leather Bible open in front of him. His hair long gone, the wrinkles under his eyes tell the story of his years, exhausted from the daily load of a preacher. One would never expect the fury and hell-fire to spew from his aged body, but the solemn man preaches exuberantly for a solid hour on “Where are the Men?” The altar fills with men, young and old alike, begging forgiveness for not taking the baton and leading their homes, for not being an example of leadership in the church. Women weep quietly in their pews, privately asking God to help them be a more submissive wife, a better help-meet to their husbands. When the service ends, the women exchange glances, communicating the understanding of trials and struggles as stay-at-home wives and mothers. They never utter a word, understanding it is “a shame for women to speak in church” (KJV 1 Cor 14:35).
Loading their children into the vehicles, they sit quietly, waiting patiently for their husbands to finish fellowshipping, waving enthusiastically at one another through the windows and windshields. Although an outlier, even in extreme fundamentalism, this peculiar church takes Paul’s words to Corinth literally when he says, “Let your women keep silence in the church: for it is not permitted unto them to speak” (1 Cor 14:34). According to Merrian-Webster, patriarchy is “a society or institution organized according to the principles or practices of patriarchy: a social organization marked by the supremacy of the father in the clan or family, the legal dependence of wives and children, and the reckoning of descent and inheritance in the male line.” Despite the variation between congregations, the majority of Independent Fundamental Baptist (IFB) churches create an environment of male superiority that encompasses not only the walls of the church but permeates into the sacred structure and confines of the home.
Suffering Not to Teach
“Let the woman learn in silence, in all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.” 1 Timothy 2:11-12
Throughout Scripture, God uses women in various capacities to complete His work. In the Old Testament, God used Esther to stand up before King Ahasuerus in order to save the children of Israel from Hamon’s decree. God further sent Deborah, a prophetess (Jdg. 4:4), to call Barak to take ten thousand men and go after the people of Jabin. Despite these accounts, however, IFB pastors commonly rail against women preachers, mocking them for being unsubmissive and “usurping authority over the man”, further disputing the age of which young boys graduate to requiring a male teacher. Some pastors even venture to the extent of saying that if two men are discussing Scripture or theology, a woman should refrain from expressing her opinion, citing any augmentation would reflect poorly on her husband. In the event of a woman’s Bible study at home, a man should not be present in the room because he could accidentally overhear part of the instruction and inadvertently be taught by a woman. Someone should have informed Deborah considering she was a judge in Israel for forty years (Jdg. 5:31).
But what was Barak’s response to Deborah’s call to go? To hide behind a woman’s skirt: “If thou wilt go with me, then I will go: but if that wilt not go with me, then I will not go” (Jdg. 4:8), to which Deborah responded, “I will surely go with thee: notwithstanding the journey that thou takest shall not be for thine honor; for the LORD shall sell Sisera into the hand of a woman” (Jdg. 4:9). How ironic that God used yet another woman in the account, Jael, to drive a tent nail into Sisera’s temple with a hammer, fastening it into the ground (Jdg. 4:22). The idea of a woman involved in either situation would be considered appalling because the woman did not “wait on the Lord” to send a man to analyze the situation appropriately and accomplish the task.
The idea of a woman’s silence can further be carried over into business meetings. In the majority of churches my husband and I grew up in, the pastor met with deacons beforehand to determine information to be presented before the church, and then opened the floor for questions from all members of voting age, male or female. In our last IFB church, deacons were purposely not established, contrary to Scripture, and decisions were carried out through “the men of the church.” Every year, a men’s meeting was held to discuss positions such as treasurer and head usher. In the afternoon, the men returned home and discussed the information with their wives, and any grievances or disagreements the wives had could be presented through their husbands in the evening. Any business requiring immediate attention was discussed during a men’s meeting following the morning service, with information again transferred to the wives through their husbands, peradventure the husbands even deemed it necessary for their wives to be informed. It was not until following a recent church split that there was a meeting for “women without male representation.”
Within ministries, women’s roles are shaped by Peter’s words, “giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel” (1 Peter 3:7). While either gender may participate in musical performance, women may not lead in the congregational worship. Even in times of desperation, women are not permitted to be greeters or ushers, but are expected to miss services for nursery work, part of their “sacrifice” even as potential wives and mothers. Before special meetings, task lists to be completed are divided between the men and the women, men accomplishing jobs involving painting, lifting or any form of hardware and construction. Women are limited to cleaning bathrooms, kitchens, sanctuaries and baseboards while being expected to care for children. Pastors preach that having designated differences between men and women supposedly positions women on a pedestal of honor. In actuality, it establishes a false security within an environment of male superiority.
Though an unspoken rule in IFB churches, women are expected to possess intelligence enough to teach children at home or in a Sunday school class, while any questioning or expression of judgement and critical scriptural analysis is severely frowned upon. A woman is expected to ask questions of her husband at home- as is stated in Scripture- but should a woman openly show disagreement, she is essentially viewed as critical and unsubmissive. Even in terms of affirmation, churches generally consider it unacceptable for a woman to say, “Amen!” in church because it is considered “teaching the men,” and thus “usurping authority.” Take it one step further to women who are naturally extroverted, they are considered boisterous and loud, rather than having the assumed “meek and quiet spirit” of the introverted. Women are expected to be seen and only heard under the expectations and allowances of the men.
*Disclaimer* This series, “Why Am I a Baptist?” is NOT an exhaustive list of IFB doctrine and standards. Because of the autonomous nature of IFB churches, this evaluation is of the movement as a whole, rather than a hard-and-fast rule. It may be possible to find healthy IFB churches, but they are few and far between because of various associations known as “camps”, typically surrounding well-known preachers or preference of worship style.
Why Am I a Baptist?
IFB Doctrine: The Baptist Distinctives
IFB Churches: Patriarchy in Church Polity (Part One)
IFB Churches: Patriarchy and the Leading Lady (Part Two)
IFB Churches: Patriarchy in Marriage (Part Three)
IFB Churches: Patriarchy and Keeping at Home (Part Four)
IFB Churches: Patriarchy and Sexual Obedience (Part Five)
IFB Churches: Patriarchy and Domestic Abuse (Part Six)
IFB Standards: Rigid Music and Dress Standards (Part One)
