Category: holiness standards | Page 4

Confusion About United Pentecostal Churches?

The following is a guest post from one of our readers who wishes to remain anonymous, with a some comments added by me. It is a response to a public Facebook post (he has removed the post) by a young man named Westley Ellis, who is the son of Jeremy Ellis (He removed that profile and is now found here), a United Pentecostal Church pastor in Saint Joe, Arkansas. (See the church.)

Westley’s writing will appear in black, with the rebuttal comments in red. My comments will be in green.

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This rebuttal is based on the firsthand experience of a former UPC member (22 years) who served in multiple leadership capacities, paid my tithes faithfully, adhered to all standards, and was viewed as a model “saint” by nearly everyone who knows me. During my 22 years in the UPC, I attended four churches (leaving each one after severe pastoral abuse), and visited many others, where I met many, many people who also suffered abuse at the hands of UPC leadership. This represents the reality experienced by those who chose to leave the UPC. (Rebuttal comments marked by a dash (-).

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There seems to be some confusion about Pentecostal churches, so I figured I should clarify.

People tend to get us mixed up with other churches that are “Pentecostal” only by name. [Note: Many Oneness Pentecostals believe they are the only ones who are saved. Some even go to the extent of claiming that other Pentecostals who speak in tongues don’t really have the Holy Spirit as they believe in the Trinity and haven’t been water baptized only in the name of Jesus. Many OPs believe they are the ‘originals’ going back to the day of Pentecost. Their teachings view the vast majority of Christians as not saved.] Many times friends of mine have invited friends over to church, and they would tell them no because they instantly think of these churches. A lot of these churches spread hatred and negativity and do not exemplify Jesus in any way. [Through the years there have been many Oneness Pentecostal ministers and churches that have spread hatred and negativity.]

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So without further ado, allow me to throw some rumors that go around about real Pentecostal churches out the window:

1. We don’t handle snakes.
– But they do speak in tongues, run, jump, scream, dance, shake, fall down, and wail.

[There are Oneness Pentecostal churches that handle snakes. Allow me to remind people of ‘Snake Salvation‘ from National Geographic, the TV show which featured a couple of these. Jamie Coots, one of the featured pastors, died after being bitten. At least one book has been written about Oneness Pentecostal snake handling churches.]

2. We don’t kick people out because they don’t dress like us. That’s prejudice, and it’s a sin.
– But most positions on the platform (singing, preaching, etc.) or in church leadership are off-limits to people who don’t adhere to the dress standards.

3. We don’t stop women from engaging in ministry. In fact, there’s been tons of encouragement toward women in the Pentecostal community in recent years.
– But women are commanded to be in submission to men and are not allowed to “usurp” authority.

[In their beginnings, the United Pentecostal Church had a higher percentage of women ministers than they appear to have now. They exclude women from many positions. Women cannot be a District Superintendent, a District Secretary-Treasurer, a District Presbyter or a District Global Missions Director. The chances of a woman ever becoming the General Superintendent are quite slim. Some may be interested in reading Janet Trout’s 2014 dissertation, “A Study of Attitudes toward Women Serving in Any Office if Elected by the Ministerial Constituency of the United Pentecostal Church International” or Cindy Miller’s 2015 dissertation, “What Are United Pentecostal Church International Women Pastors Experiencing: A Qualitative Inquiry.”]

4. We aren’t a cult. We don’t force you to do anything. If you don’t want to pray, that’s fine. If you don’t want to be prayed for, that’s fine.
– But if you go to their churches, you may be strongly pressured to go to the altar. People will likely put their hands on you, scream in your ear, and pressure you to speak in tongues. They don’t believe you can be saved without speaking in tongues, and their #1 goal is to get you to do it.

5. We don’t handle snakes. (did I already say that?)
– See above.

6. We don’t spread rumors or hate about people that decide to leave the church. That is gossip, and that is a sin.
– This is completely, 100% false. Chester Wright, a revered bishop in the UPC, compares those who leave the church to a “bowel movement” in a videotaped sermon. This sentiment is repeated by many UPC pastors and leaders. UPC pastors often launch full-fledged character assassinations against those who leave, calling them bitter, rebellious, mentally unstable, and backslidden. Current members are encouraged to distance themselves from those who left. In addition, when you leave, your former pastor and your new pastor will have a meeting about you before you’re “permitted” to transition to the new church. The purpose of this meeting is for the former pastor to warn the new pastor about the level of threat you pose to the new church. This is standard practice.

7. We don’t baptize babies. You have to be old enough to comprehend the meaning of baptism, and decide in your own free will if you want to be baptized.
– But they will baptize a 3-year-old if the 3-year-old has spoken in tongues.

[I personally witnessed a four-year-old get baptized after supposedly speaking in tongues. Some will also baptize a child without the permission of the parents. This happened to the child of a friend of mine, who was not a member of the UPCI church.]

8. We don’t look you in the eye and call you a sinner. In fact, it’s common sense to NOT name names, or point fingers when preaching because that’s just plain rude.
– Also 100% false. Sure, the polite UPC members may not say it directly to your face, but preachers will remind you of your sinful state repeatedly from the pulpit in their sermons. Make no mistake: if you are not UPC and adhering to all standards, you ARE a sinner in their opinion.

[My former UPCI pastor did indeed name names during sermons.]

9. You don’t have to practice speaking in tongues before you get baptized… Speaking in tongues is something that just happens, you can’t really learn it.
– But they will encourage you to mimic others who are speaking in tongues, say “hallelujah” or “Jesus” over and over until you’re tongue-tied, and they may touch or jiggle your chin to try to “help” you.

10. This isn’t based off emotion. This one is up to you to decide. I can tell you it’s not, and you don’t have to believe me. But I guarantee you once you’ve been in a Pentecostal service and felt the love of Jesus sweep over you, it’s a feeling like no other. While there most definitely is emotion involved, there’s a whole lot more to it. A whole lot more…
– The emotional highs experienced in UPC services can be experienced in secular ball games and concerts, or even concerts by non-UPC Christian artists, who the UPC believes are unsaved.

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Alright, now I’m going to tell you some things that we do and stand for so that you have a reference:

1. We love everybody. It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white, gay or straight, drug addict or clean, drunk or sober. We will welcome you into church with open arms. God loves everyone, and wants everyone to be set free.
– Yes, you will be welcomed into the church with open arms (and love bombing). But if you’re gay, the UPC does not believe you can remain gay and be saved. They claim to accept you as you are, but what they don’t tell you is that they will expect you to drastically change in order to earn their version of salvation. If you’re a woman, you will have to stop cutting your hair, stop coloring your hair (Westley removed this post), stop wearing makeup, stop wearing jewelry, stop wearing nail polish, stop wearing pants or shorts (dresses and skirts only), and stop wearing sleeveless or low-cut tops. If you’re a man, you will have to stop wearing shorts and shave your beard. Both sexes will have to stop drinking, smoking, going to movies, and a long list of other activities. [For some of these, see this.]

[To see how some Oneness Pentecostals are toward homosexuals, see this article. As to racism, the UPCI used to have a separate section in their yearly Directories where they listed ‘colored’ ministers. Even in recent years, they have had problems with racism among their ministers and churches. See this article.]

2. Salvation is for EVERYONE! Nobody is predestined to hell, I don’t care what some people tell you. Everyone has to opportunity to be saved, and we believe the Acts 2:38 message is the way to get it.
– But only if you obey the Acts 2:38 message will you go to heaven (according to the UPC). No one else will go.

[The United Pentecostal Church believes that unless one repents, is water baptized by immersion in the name of Jesus, and speaks in tongues, which they claim is the ‘initial evidence’ of receiving God’s Spirit, you are not and will not be saved. You are also to reject the Trinity belief and believe in the Oneness of God. Read what Westley himself says about people who leave. (He has removed this post.)]

3. Come as you are. You don’t have to dress like a Pentecostal to come to a Pentecostal church. We won’t look down on you at all. You can come wearing whatever you’re comfortable in.
– Yes, you can come as you are, but you will be pressured not to stay that way. See #1.

4. You get to choose. We aren’t going to force our beliefs on you, or shove anything down your throat. You get to make the decision on your own. Free will is one of God’s most beautiful creations.
– But you will be told repeatedly that there is no other way to salvation besides the UPC plan of salvation.

5. We’re always praying for you. Whether you’ve left the church, or are curious about it, we’re always praying for you. We want you to experience the joy of Christ. We want you experience the Holy Ghost. It’s a liberating and beautiful experience.
– If you leave, they will never, ever accept that you’ve found salvation or peace any other way. They will continue to pressure you to return, and when dramatic events happen in the news, they will send you tearful messages about how they’re concerned for your soul because the return of Jesus is imminent. If you don’t respond to their pressure, after some time passes, you won’t hear from them at all, except for the occasional “I have a burden for you” fear mongering. Lasting, true friendship with most people in the UPC is contingent upon you remaining in the UPC.

I hope this cleared up some confusion about Pentecostal churches. If you’re curious about this Pentecost thing, and want to know more, I highly recommend checking out a Pentecostal church service. It’s completely up to you, but I guarantee you won’t regret it!

If you don’t know where to find a real Pentecostal church, I highly recommend you use this tool here: upci . org/resources/locate-a-church
(the spaces are there because people were having trouble sharing)

All you have to do is type in your city, and it will locate a church nearby!

Remember, Jesus loves you. Have a blessed day/night/whenever you’re reading this. God bless!

[Some current United Pentecostal Church members might want to venture outside of their approved books and literature and seek out material that shows aspects of their history they often leave out or don’t openly share, as well as what thousands of former members have shared about their experiences. It’s not the bed of roses that some would have you believe. Here’s just a handful who have shared how they have been harmed. There’s also our series on sexual abuse and the United Pentecostal Church.]

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Finding Jesus

My journey began, as I’m sure most of yours did, searching for Jesus. Finding out his true character has been a 20 plus year journey for me. I was in my twenties with two children. An abusive husband and a longing for love, purpose and escape from the pain. We got invited to a United Pentecostal church. I had not grown up consistently going to church. I knew basics and my mom had taught me about Jesus, but I’d never had the experiences that come with teaching.

My first thought of these people were man, these people are crazy! But, as with most, they started out so loving. Giving lots of attention, time, clothes, etc. Looking back, now I realize there were a lot of inconsistencies and red flags but I was enjoying the love there as opposed to what I was living at home, so I didn’t notice. At first things weren’t as crazy. We sang at different churches. We still visited our family that wasn’t UPCI. Yes, my dress had changed. All the ‘standards‘ I was now abiding by. I had the Bible study with the few scriptures they used to support it. Of course it really shouldn’t be called a study because now after lots of study and prayer I see where those scriptures are taken out of context. But then I would’ve believed anything they said. And I did.

After the new wore off I started to notice that people weren’t treated equally, depending on who you were the ‘rules’ were changed. I figured out questioning wasn’t an option. You NEVER questioned leadership or the humiliation over the pulpit would be extreme. Years passed with many trials and hurts. But, this was the Christian life right? Anyone who didn’t believe as we did were lost, convicted, or persecuting us.

The pastor made the decision to withdraw from the UPCI. Many of his friends were doing the same. Basically that meant he had no one to answer to so he could do as he pleased. Oh, he had a board of elders, all filled with his best friends that supported him in everything. So basically that was all for show. The standards all of a sudden started changing. Only 3/4 length sleeves. No splits, hose at church always, no hair down, no perms, men could only wear white shirts to church. It changed it seemed every month or so. It got so bad people would be asking each other if this or that was OK. Then you would see the pastor’s daughter wearing something that someone else got sent home for. It was all so confusing.

We were no longer allowed to fellowship our ‘unsaved’ family, which meant not believing as we did. The one good thing in all these years was I had divorced my abusive, unfaithful ex-husband. And married my now husband of almost 18 years. (remember this part as it plays a vital role in us leaving, years later) We were married in the pastor’s office by him. My children grew up. I had four by then; three biological, one bonus. My boys both got kicked out of the church school. They had learning problems and their answer for that was to just spank them more. They weren’t getting enough discipline.

That was his answer for most things. More spankings, or praying more cause they had a spirit. Excessive baby crying was a spirit. Unless it was his grand-baby.

As soon as my bonus son turned 18, he left home. When my other son was 16, he went to live with my mom to escape from the abuse at church. For eight years. We rarely saw him or talked to him, if we did or if someone thought we did, he talked about us over the pulpit.

My oldest daughter married a guy in the church that had three children. She basically felt forced to marry him, was strongly encouraged by leadership and she felt as if she had no choice. She went through five years of emotional, physical, spiritual abuse. No one at church would believe her. She had black eyes, a bruised neck, he would have her going crazy, emotionally distraught, then video her and send it to the pastor. So the next service he would get over the pulpit and humiliate her and say how full of the devil she was. She almost had a mental breakdown from the abuse at home and church. We were both humiliated constantly. I was accused of interfering with her marriage because I encouraged her to go to the police. Her baby girl was said to have a devil because she was a fussy baby and wanted to nurse too much. That was her comfort for the home life she had.

Finally we went to authorities and got a restraining order for a year and after two years, she was finally ‘allowed’ to divorce him. Not long afterwards the pastor made a new rule that anyone ever married before could never marry again. She was 25 yrs old. Now remember that me and several other couples had been married before, but his answer for that was that even if it was a sin for us, that sin was on him. He told us it was OK so it was. As long as he told us.

We were told we could never be saved at any other church. If we left there, our family was cursed. He said he was the only preacher in the whole state of Mississippi that was right. That church was the only one that was right and preaching truth. After many situations, lies and abuses, we finally left. I began studying everything I had been taught for over 20 yrs. It was both scary, exciting, enlightening and freeing!

My family and I are all involved in church. A Bible believing, grace teaching, loving church, that is teaching that Jesus loves us and that salvation isn’t earned. We can’t dress or act ‘holy’ enough to be worthy of salvation. It’s all because of Jesus and his love for us. We live free! No more condemnation, humiliation. Just joy, grace and freedom. We help as many as we can that are escaping the cult, as we call it. It hasn’t all been easy but it has all been worth it. There is hope, our prayer is that others find hope and healing as we have.

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Please stop talking about Jezebel…

Ok – so first off, I’m not saying to stop talking about the Bible, or the story of Jezebel! There is a powerful principle of being unequally yoked together with an unbeliever. In the case of Ahab, a Jewish King, marrying a Canaanite princess, who served many gods was a disgrace to the line of Israel and a continuation, as 1 Kings 16 declares, the sins of many kings before Ahab.

What I actually want to stop talking about, I’m going to talk about it…and that is the effort to use Jezebel as the foundation for the house of cards within the Holiness movement as the anti-make-up and jewelry monument (idol). A statue erected and constantly glorified across pulpits to disparage and to dissuade the usage of such things. You’ll hear all about the Jezebel spirit, the ‘harlot’ spirit. I’ve heard so-called Christian women refer to another woman who wears make-up in such a fashion, “Just look at that Jezebel!”

In fact, the inspiration to this writing is a comment I received on my article Why do some legalists forbid wearing Jewelry and Makeup? that again used the ‘Jezebel’ reference. And I don’t mean to disparage the person making that honest comment, but something glaring came from it that can and should be addressed.

Description vs. Prescription

I can’t help but remember a Baptist preacher who taught on the transitional nature of the Book of Acts and how certain people ‘hang their necks’ on certain portions of Scripture without seeing the fullness of the entire testimony. In that particular case, he was speaking of the way in which the Oneness Pentecostal doctrine views Acts 2:38 as the fullness of Gospel salvation (how to get saved) but do not read the rest of the book as the description of history and transition as it was played out.

This was something that my studies also led me to understand. The book of Acts was a description of the forming of the New Testament church, it is a window into the history of the Apostles, early missionary journeys, and incredibly, the way in which the Gospel was opened up to the Gentile bride (Acts 7/8) due to the thrice rejection of the Messiah by the Jewish people.

As we see the transitions take place we also notice some fundamental changes (requirements) because of a shift from a Jewish to a Gentile audience. And there is a difference. (Acts 15, Jewish Believers still maintained the Law of Moses, Gentile Believers did not and are not commanded to) But the description of early church practices, such as communal living, selling all earthly goods was certainly NOT a prescription (commandment) to the entire New Testament church from the days of the Apostles up to the second coming of Christ.

For example, let us look at some very plain prescriptions (commandments) vs. descriptions to illustrate the difference and why it matters in this narrative.

Prescriptive Text:

“Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.” ~ 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, ESV

From this text, we draw very clear and strong conclusions of a commandment. Much like the original commandments that Yahweh gave to Moses, they weren’t ambiguous, unclear, nor arguable or debatable. The pronouncement is clear: People who do certain behaviors will not inherit (enter into) the kingdom of God.

Descriptive Text:

“And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need.” ~ Acts 2:43-45, ESV

From this text, we draw a conclusion that the early church was very communal, taking care of the physical (food, clothing, shelter) needs of each other as was needed under the persecution taking place, not just from the Roman front, but later a Jewish attack against Christianity.

The times demanded particular behaviors, and while we read about them, we don’t take this description/history as a prescription (commandment) that we are to sell all of our belongings, develop communes and live as a single community.

In a negative light or a positive light, descriptive texts should not be used as foundations or proof texts for prescriptive commandments unless they are coupled with very clear commandments.

Jezebel, the Golden Calf of the Holiness Movement

Recently, a comment was left on a previous article as I already mentioned. This is not a criticism of the commenter, just an illustration of how this connection happens;

We cannot take just 1 Bible Verse and ‘run away with it.’ We must read the ENTIRE meaning.
They decked their Faces with Paint (Make-up), and put on Ornament (Jewelry) also. Does that not sound like Jezebel to you?

This is in reference to Ezekiel 23, an incredibly strong, blatant, graphic account of the harlotry of Jerusalem and Samaria, symbolized as two sisters who engaged in much prostitution, debauchery, and idolatry who had turned away from the Lord. This prophecy, given to Ezekiel, was intended to provoke the prophet into proclaiming God’s disgust, displeasure, and desire for repentance upon the lands that he called his own. Verse 36 even says, “Son of man (Ezekiel), will you judge Oholah and Ohobilah? Then confront them with their detestable practices.”

The two sisters, Oholah (Samaria, the Gentiles) and Oholibah, (Jerusalem, the Jews) at one point were prophetically (not literally) decked with crowns, bracelets, make-up, oils and fine linens, beds, etc., and then judgment came upon them for their prostitution, adultery, and debauchery. Nowhere in this description, nor elsewhere, does Scripture teach that make-up, and/or jewelry was the prescription for their debauchery, and yet we can see and hear people making this connection via the Jezebel story simply because of the mention in Scripture.

We could conclude, as others have with the make-up and jewelry, that the olive oil, beds, fine linen, and other descriptive items were equally sinful, right? There is no doubt a reason for the mentioning of these things, but to use ‘honorable mentions’ as commandment prescription is dangerous, to the creation of false doctrines.

Jezebel

1 Kings 16-22 recounts the history of King Ahab of Jerusalem who reigned C 874-853 BC and includes the final days of Elijah the prophet who was responsible for the killing of the prophets of Baal (the religion to which Jezebel belonged) (1 Kings 18) and then his fleeing from the wrath of Jezebel in 1 Kings 19.

The problem with Jezebel and Ahab was not the make-up, nor jewelry. Rather, it was that Ahab was far from God, Yahweh, and marrying a princess of Caanan brought with it the need to erect temples to the false god Baal (1 Kings 16:32) in order to please Jezebel.

The story of Jezebel picks back up in 2 Kings chapter 9, long after Ahab’s death. When Elisha anoints Jehu (2 Kings 9:6) as King his first commandment, and seemingly the reason for Jehu’s anointing, is to destroy the house of Ahab and with it, the judgment of Jezebel for the murder of God’s prophets and people that she had wrought in retaliation for the slaying of the priests of Baal by the hands of Elijah. (1 Kings 18:20-22)

And the only portion of this story that comes up in this particular vein of thought is one small verse, that says, “And she painted her eyes and adorned her head and looked out of the window.” (2 Kings 9:30)

Somehow this simple act of hers, obviously attempting to disarm Jehu with her beauty, is the crux of the story. Little mention is given of her life of sin, murder, worship of false gods, the destruction she brought to the priests of Yahweh. Rather, all the legalists can focus on, is that she painted her eyes and put on a wig. Thus, anyone who paints her eyes and wears a wig…is a Jezebel.

Conclusion

At this point, it seems almost a moot point to iterate again how silly of an argument this is, but there are people who believe it so it is important, in love to explain these things. This article is long for a reason – because we needed the contrast of descriptive vs. prescriptive texts to understand the literary meanings being expressed by the writers, then twisted and perverted by modern readers.

As noted in my original article, Why do some legalists forbid wearing Jewelry and Makeup, there are many locations within Scripture that speak very, very favorably of make-up, and jewelry, the adorning of the body, and indeed even makes the connection with the Bride of Christ (the Church) preparing herself for her groom (Christ). (Rev 21:2)

There are many great resources into the customs of Jewish weddings, the attire of men and women in that ceremony. The 10-coined headdress, necklaces, and other jewelry were part of a traditional, sacred Jewish wedding ceremony. MacArthur and other Bible commentators have made notes about this when reviewing select Scriptures. We even see the God of Heaven and Earth, in the form of man, Jesus Christ, speaking of these coins in the parable of the lost coin in Luke 15:8-10. And in no way did He (Jesus) condemn this, but rather made the analogous connection of the joy a young woman would feel upon finding one of these lost coins as to the joy expressed in heaven when one sinner repents.

We must be very careful not to add anything, or take anything away, from Scripture, in our attempts to honor Scripture. The legalist will add to the word their own concocted dogmas, such as we are speaking about here, while the equal and opposite force will attempt to take things out of Scripture for the sake of not offending people or for allowing sinful behavior. Both are condemned in Scripture. (Deut 4:2, Deut 12:32, Rev 22:18)

Just for the record – I’m not out here arguing these points to get people to do these things. My wife does not wear make-up, and I’ve never asked her to. She doesn’t need to, and only will if she chooses to, and that makes me happy. My purpose is not to endorse the make-up industry but to endorse the proper handling of the Bible.

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Art Therapy Toolbox: Anatomy of Self-Care

Plunging deep into the plush couch cushions, nothing beats the cozy holiday flavor of warm chai rooibos tea on a late night after the children are finally asleep, watching re-runs of Little House on the Prairie while drifting off to dream land. Yeah, right. If only it were truly quiet and serene in the dark hours of night. Real life is more like flopping down onto the torn vinyl couch, wearing a vomit-stained shirt and the hideous pants dear mother-in-law gifted us at Christmas time that were now the only clean pair left in the house, and bawling my eyes out for the third time. The entire container of creamy chocolate and peanut butter ice cream, purchased just yesterday, is almost devoured, and surely, I did not consume both two-liter bottles of mountain dew in a forty-eight hour period by myself! The empty box of snack cakes is part of maintaining my girlish figure, complimenting my pro-wrestling abilities to get two active toddlers and an infant to sleep within the last half-hour before midnight!

And forget Little House on the Prairie. I need “Grey’s Anatomy”- McDreamy, McSteamy, the works!- “How to Get Away with Murder”, and literally ANYTHING that is not Elmo, considering that the little minions will all be awake for church and jumping on my bed in a mere five hours. All I want is sleep; pure, precious, seven-days-worth of sleep. Even if I slept for a month, however, I would not truly feel rested because I am more than just physically exhausted. I am drained mentally and emotionally, continually walking a tight rope between anxiety and depression, juggling diapers and ministry while avoiding triggers and trying to move forward with life. What I need are ways to care for myself throughout the day so I can do more than simply manage and “get through” with yet another bowl of ice cream.

This exercise begins by asking what your self-care truly looks like and how it has changed since the occurrence of trauma(s). In my life, I drastically shifted towards stress-eating enormous amounts of sweets, while compulsively working, planning and cleaning when I could be sleeping, and curling up on my bed as often as possible because I was not ready to deal with the day. I have almost all together given up on make-up and looking at least half-way put together when I walk out the door, and time to myself is a rare gem. The assignment challenged me to look for pictures that represent people, places, things, ideas, locations, etc. that can enhance my overall well-being. Now, as with any of the previous art exercises, I have dreaded searching through magazines, but once again, this technique has proven not only beneficial, but valuable. Rather than limiting self-care ideas to baths and long walks, I realized that I specifically need to be outdoors, around people and pets despite my enhanced fears of social settings, especially in church, and I remembered that I truly love music. Our old church was against everything except for hymns too old for copyright and melodic remembrance, while encouraging isolation limited to an encompassing gossip circle more intricate than politics during election year. I needed out of the house and I needed freedom. I wanted to look beautiful again and feel beautiful again, whether that was modern clothing, understanding make-up, wearing jewelry, or simply putting on some high heels (aka “prostitute shoes” according to my old mentor).

My favorite part of the pictures I found, however, are the pants that say, “Made You Look!” Just before creating this picture, I finally stepped out of my comfort zone of legalistic dress standards and bought a dark blue pair of boot-cut jeans and guess what? People did not stare at me because I was different. People did not automatically assume that I hated their guts. And guess what else? I felt alive. From there, I started a strict diet and workout, resulting in losing almost thirty pounds in two months. I felt human again, but more than that, I felt like I was learning who I was again apart from the cult-crazy. And taking care of myself through the day made life’s difficulties a little more manageable. Oh, and while I was not comfortable with dancing beforehand, I have found that baltering – dancing artlessly, without particular grace or skill, but with enjoyment- allows me to dance off loads of stress and connect with my inner child again.

*For more art therapy ideas from Managing Traumatic Stress through Art, check out the full list of exercises from the blog post: “Managing Traumatic Stress Through Art.“

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Free: From Legalism to Grace Breaking Out of the United Pentecostal Church Book Giveaway

As with all of our giveaways, this is only open to those with a USA mailing address.

The true tragedy of this reality is many good people are honestly doing the very best they know how, but are tangled up in this religion. Many people I know are living a life of spiritual bondage with the purest intentions. They feel oppressed, but don’t know why. They are questioning things that maybe don’t feel right to them, dismissing it as their issue. Wanting to ask questions or even leave, but can’t because they fear losing relationships with loved ones or worse, having a reprobate mind and going to hell. This is why I cannot keep my mouth shut. They are the reason I want to share my story. – Jennifer Brewer

This is your chance to receive a new copy of Free: From Legalism to Grace Breaking Out of the United Pentecostal Church by Jennifer Brewer. One copy will be given away. The book was released in August 2019 and is the third memoir from 2019 that deals in part with the United Pentecostal Church. Available in paperback and Kindle, it is 124 pages and sells for $6.99 or $3.99 for the Kindle version. If you purchase the paperback, you can receive the Kindle for only 99 cents. Earlier this year we were able to give away three copies of the first UPCI related memoir from 2019, The Uncomfortable Confessions of a Preacher’s Kid by Ronna Russell, and have a current giveaway in progress for Let’s Go to California: The Story of the Singing Holley Family by Margaret Toedy Duke.

The idea of leaving although appealing was daunting. I was acutely aware of how everyone would think about us. All of the people we knew and loved, including my family, would genuinely be concerned for our souls. They would feel we had left the “truth” and be bound for hell. They would view us as souls to be saved, their personal mission field. …From the beginning, we had wanted nothing more than to reaffirm our childhood beliefs by studying out God’s word. Instead, God guided our studies from the get-go and had shown us in indisputable ways the errors of our current doctrine.

This giveaway is a drawing and not a first come, first served giveaway. To enter, just leave a comment to show you wish to be included. The drawing will close on Saturday August 24 at 8pm (eastern time), after which I will draw the winner. You will then need to email me your mailing address if I do not already have it. There is absolutely no cost to enter. Don’t be alarmed if your comment does not immediately show as they require approval when you are commenting for the first time.

We always provide these at no charge to our readers. Two copies of this book were previously given away in our support group on Facebook.

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