“Let another man praise thee, and not thine out mouth; a stranger, and not thine own lips.” Proverbs 27:2
“Every way of man is right in his own eyes: but the Lord pondereth the hearts.” Proverbs 21:2
As a social butterfly and extrovert, greeting came almost naturally, even in a backward church where several of the prominent men hesitated to vocally welcome or shake hands with a woman who had not spoken up or extended a hand of fellowship first. Surprisingly, this ministry opened many opportunities to connect with church members that tended to keep to themselves, or ones with whom our personalities did not easily mesh. The best part was that with every service we greeted (only about once a week), we developed a better grasp of some of our church family’s facial expressions and body language, allowing us to reach out to those in our church family who appeared to be silently carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders. On the other hand, unfortunately, greeting also increased the incidence of a reoccurring interaction with Douglas Stauffer, yet another product of what we feel is Stauffer’s greatest infatuation: himself.
A Peculiar Greeting
Sometime before serving in the greeter ministry, probably around when we all first joined at Antioch, he caught us off guard when he shook our hands and said, “Good to see me!” It was such a unique and comical statement that even when he said it the second time, it had only slightly lost its charm. By the third time, however, it had grown old, and even more so with every time he repeated it after that. For a long time, I brushed it off, attempting to give Stauffer the benefit of the doubt because of how often he traveled, and “Who could possibly remember everyone he made a particular statement to, especially if he used it at every church?”
When he stayed in the Knoxville area for several months at a time, however, focusing on his next book, Stauffer continued to use that phrase at most services with my family and countless others, revealing that there was likely some truth behind his playful statement. As if in betrayal, his tone and body language also left the lasting impression in several families that he actually believed the statement himself. I can still hear his sarcastic tone as he regularly greeted my husband at the door with a handshake and a “Good to see me!”, but at least formally greeting Stauffer at the door prevented him from focusing solely on our children while completely ignoring my husband, as had been Stauffer’s habit for years already. Were we justified in our frustration or were we merely becoming disgruntled over something petty and insignificant?
Parroted Justifications
Over the years, I privately questioned a couple people I trusted and respected about Doug Stauffer’s attitude in general, but the majority excused Stauffer’s words and mannerisms as merely being a part of his personality and confidence. There is no doubt that he has an outgoing personality, and, in the world’s view, that portrayed confidence during public speaking is considered essential, but then even in general conversations with out church members, keeping my hesitations to myself, many seemed to randomly parrot the justifications about his confidence and being a man who “loved numbers.” It was as if they were sub-consciously attempting to convince themselves at the same time, but because these were godly people who knew Stauffer better than I did, I attempted to let my guard down, even though I could never biblically justify the one continually boasting of his achievements in the Christian life. Later on, however, Stauffer confirmed my hesitations about his lack of character by relentlessly tearing down others and eventually placing his own pride before the safety of my family on a pending missions trip. Before finally getting to Stauffer’s deceitful actions in the months leading up to our trip to Zambia, let us look at Stauffer’s own perspective on the matter, as well as how his pattern of arrogance appears to continue after leaving Antioch Baptist Church.
Douglas Stauffer’s Prayer About His Pride
Just as several did in our church, Stauffer often supported his continual rattling-off of numbers by stating that he “loves numbers” as a CPA [Certified Public Accountant], but we feel his arrogance goes well beyond this overly used justification. A “love of numbers” is amoral by itself and does not automatically result in continually exclaiming one’s numerical achievements at seemingly every turn in order to increase other’s perception of his or her own knowledge and intellectual value. According to Douglas Stauffer, we are not alone in this observation. By Stauffer’s own testimony behind the pulpit in 2017, several people had accused him of being arrogant over the years, but after seriously praying about it, he concluded that he was, in fact, “not arrogant.” Therefore, taking into account the vast expanse of his supposed lack of arrogance, self-importance and egotism, I find the irony almost comical that on April 6, 2018, Doug Stauffer stated something seemingly profound on his personal Facebook page:
- Douglas Stauffer (April 6, 2018): “God won’t bless most of us with Bible knowledge because rather than a swollen heart, we would get a swollen head! (2 Cor 12:7).” (Link)
I believe the Bible says it best in Proverbs 17:28, “Even a fool, when he holdeth his peace, is counted wise: and he that shutteth his lips is esteemed a man of understanding.”
A Continued Public Display
In 2019, just under a year after Stauffer’s carnal message at the King James Bible Conference where he compared godly people to a bunch of babies sucking their thumbs, Douglas Stauffer took over the position of pastor at Faith Independent Baptist Church in Niceville, Florida. As is to be expected, several people have posted reviews on the church’s Facebook page about how blessed they are to have him as a pastor and how thankful they are for him. While I truly hope Stauffer can learn from his past and actually treat people better as a pastor than he did as an “evangelist,” I feel that even his new stationary and promotional products continue the pattern of Stauffer promoting himself.
Notice the particular focus Stauffer placed (or allowed to be placed) on his achievements and accomplishments on his business cards and letterheads that he posted publicly on his Facebook page for all to see while “up at 3am studying for the Revelation seminar.” As is consistent with the way we believe Stauffer presents himself in a church and particularly while preaching, we feel that these documents paint an initial, surface-level focus on Christ, but is then packed with completely unnecessary information that focuses toward the great, accomplished and knowledgeable Douglas Stauffer. The Bible says, “He must increase; and I must decrease” (John 3:30). Christ is the One that Stauffer is supposed to be exalting in the ministry, not himself.
- Douglas Stauffer (October 22, 2019 at 3:35am): Up at 3AM studying for the Revelation seminar…but want to share my new business card and letterhead. (Link)
The Prideful Preacher
Upon questioning any of his actions over the years, and especially following the Bible Conference in 2018, several justified Stauffer’s wording and mannerisms as merely being part of his personality and confidence. There is no doubt that he has an outgoing personality, and, in the world’s view, portrayed confidence during public speaking is considered essential, but continually proclaiming achievements and relentlessly tearing others down has no place in the life of a Christian. I firmly believe that this is more a matter of Douglas Stauffer’s character, or rather, the lack thereof.
Though one can attempt to give the benefit of the doubt, assuming Doug Stauffer may, in fact, be clueless about his prideful and spiritually abusive nature to use his presumed positions of authority to destroy anyone who does not worship the ground that he walks on, his proclamations in 2018 of purposefully starting off meetings with a heavy hand and being able to do whatever he wanted in the ministry at Antioch proves otherwise. Because of the numerous red flags about his lack of character, we had attempted to be cordial and friendly, but cautious. As much as we tried to avoid him beyond the casual greetings and conversations as church members, his swollen head eventually placed him at the head of missions, resulting in his direct influence over our time at Antioch Baptist. Personally, the part I will never forget is when Stauffer repeatedly used deceit, potentially leaving my family in a dangerous predicament in our upcoming missions trip to Africa.
In this series, I share my thoughts and opinions concerning these ministers and the events which led to my departure. Click here to continue reading: “Blindsided: A Missionary’s Dream” or click on the link below.
For a list of the complete series, click here.
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