Category: no pants on women | Page 6

Grace And Works

What can we ever do that will be considered good enough for an almighty, righteous, holy God? We’re human, He’s God. We’re born in sin and shapen in iniquity, He’s the creator of all things. Will skirts or long hair or a lack of jewelry ever be sufficient?

I know the standard answer in churches I’ve been to has been that we do those things because we love Him, not to be saved. Yet if a person doesn’t do those things, are they considered saved? The answer to that is generally “by their fruits you shall know them.” What fruits? The Bible nowhere mentions clothes or hair as fruits. The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, goodness, kindness, gentleness, meekness. And thorns are definitely not cut hair, pants and makeup. Attitudes can get prickly, but the way we dress doesn’t hurt others any time we get near them. If your imagination immediately jumped to a hooker or stripper and the way she dresses, and you thought, yes, the way they dress can hurt us, I’ll remind you that the way that person dresses doesn’t hurt you unless you have a fault that keeps you from fleeing that situation or leads you to lust. But lying, backbiting and slander can hurt a person even if they haven’t done anything wrong.

Thinking about all of this last night I realized that when we do certain things to try to be saved or look down on others as unsaved if they don’t do them, we place ourselves in a very dangerous situation: we lift ourselves up on an equal with God. God is holy and righteous. Our righteousness, the very best we can do, is as filthy rags to Him. No matter how “good” we try to be, we still fall short, because He knows our hearts. He knows the greed or pride that motivates, even if it’s just a tiny bit of our motivation.

That doesn’t mean that we should stop doing the right things or stop being good. But being good is not a list of rules and dress codes, it’s a mindset. It’s a matter of a right heart and a clean conscience. And it doesn’t involve judging others for the ways we think they might not measure up to us.

What is good? Jesus himself asked a man why he called him good, since there’s none good but God. And what should we do, if Christianity isn’t about being good? Well, when we live in Jesus, and He lives in us, won’t His goodness shine through us? But what is His goodness? It’s not dress standards, it’s love. Compassion, mercy, gentleness… grace. Those are the things we should focus on, not externals. Anyone can dress a certain way, but true fruit- love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, gentleness, meekness- who can imitate those for any length of time? Who can even live like that most of the time?

If those Christian attitudes are more difficult to display than long sleeves, shouldn’t they be the focus? And if we know we can’t produce those fruits in our lives consistently on our own, then can we take pride in living that way? Absolutely not. Because living with love, joy, peace, patience… having those in our lives takes something more than a credit card and the right clothes in the closet. It takes Christ.

Just Couldn’t Stay Part 4

Continued from Part Three.

I stopped everything. Pants, cutting my hair, make up, movies, music, friends, sometimes sex with the DH, being best friends with my DH, happiness, peace of mind and you can insert just about anything else and I stopped it. I got baptized to satisfy my mother and stop listening to her go on and on about it. I was okay with it, I had no problems. I was so caught up with this organization I didn’t even notice. I want to say I was so caught up in Jesus that I didn’t notice. Honestly I don’t know.

When I reflect on it now it seems like such a whirlwind. I know I loved God and was wanting to do it all for him, however I can’t lie and say I didn’t want to be a part of what I thought was going to save me. Being Apostolic Pentecostal was everything. We were not Christians, we were Apostolic for the mere word Christian was not good enough for us. That would put us in the category as everybody else. And we alone where the bride of Christ no one else was. They were not our brothers and sisters, atheists were more tolerated than non-oneness Pentecostals.

I remember after my second child was born praying for a new set of tongues because I wanted to hear an actual language. I prayed and fasted a very long time for this. I couldn’t stand the thought of going to Hell. Tongues was the Holy Ghost and without it you were not saved. Did I ever get it? I don’t really want to answer that question. I am still sorting out tongues. I believe whatever I do in prayer is real because it comes from my heart. I also believe in tongues because the bible talks about it, however the beliefs I once had about them is what I am sorting out. That was vulnerable to write to say the least. It was a lot keeping up the separated from everybody in the whole wide world doctrine and make sure I pray in tongues every day or loss of salvation.

I had a powerful moment with God during this time. Once in prayer I remember Him telling me I came to HIM thinking he was mad at me all the time, because that is what I always knew. That had to be God for no one else knew what I went through in prayer. I constantly started out my prayers with repenting and not always getting anywhere because I thought he only tolerated me, not loved me. I got in on a package deal, this whole salvation thing. He died for everybody else and I was given the crumbs. I wasn’t important in church. I didn’t hold a position in church in my early years, so that meant God felt the same way about me as everybody else did, a second-class Christian.

Then something happened, that got me to start thinking about a lot of things. I went through a couple of pastoral changes. The thing is every one of them believed different things. They all held to the three step plan, but the last pastor added on a lot you had to do to be saved. He was WPF and oh brother that is when it all hit the fan for me.

To be continued… [Note: Unfortunately it never was finished.]

Abominations

I’ve heard it preached repeatedly that we can’t give God anything but our best. Deuteronomy 17:1 is used as a reason for this. But that passage isn’t talking about giving less than the best for sacrifices. It says nothing about seeking out the very fattest and best lamb, it just says not to give one that is blemished or obviously disfigured. It appears to be talking more about deliberately giving an unworthy sacrifice. Going to the herd and finding an animal not worth keeping and killing it. At any rate, it isn’t talking about beating ourselves over the head, losing sleep over whether we could have done anything better that day or not.

Of all of these, all but Deuteronomy 22:5 obviously discuss things spoken against in the 10 Commandments and again in the New Testament by Jesus and by the writers of the Epistles.

Food laws were reversed in Peter’s vision “what I have made clean call thou not common.” Gentiles were also made clean in this vision and the activities in Acts 10 that followed. What else was considered ‘clean’ at that point? What does Deuteronomy 22:5 really mean? Does it stand alone as saying women shouldn’t wear pants? Hardly. It is part of the blended gender issue that is defined as sexual immorality. There is nothing sexually immoral, nothing about blending genders, determined by ladies wearing pants.

What things were abominable in the Bible?
In the Old Testament, certain foods (Lev 11), homosexual acts (Lev 18:22), idols (Deut 7:25, 12:31, 13:14), dishonorable sacrifices (Deut 17:1), mixing genders (Deut 22:5), cheating in business practices (or possibly favoring some people and cheating others) (Deut 25:16, Prov 11:1, Prov 20:10), frowardness (Prov 3:32), Prov 6:16 and 12:22 and 16:5, Justifying the wicked and condemning the just (Prov 17:15), Jer 6 and 8, Ez 18:12, sexual immorality Jer 22:11, were an abomination. Why pull out only Deuteronomy 22:5? Why are the others not preached often as abomination?

Standards, Questions

Before I left, I really started studying some things out and realized that my fears were deliberately instilled and completely unfounded. I’ve questioned things that happened in church and certain doctrines for awhile. Until recently, though, I tried to squelch those questions or reason them out. But the answers are pretty obvious- and not in the Pentecostals’ favor.

I’m actually still more conservative than a lot of liberal Pentecostals, and don’t know quite what to do about that yet. I love my hair, and get lots of compliments on it. I actually went and bought MORE skirts after I left the church- but the church I was in, we couldn’t wear denim on church days or outreach days. That left Mondays and Fridays… and my job limits denim on Mondays. So when I rebelled, I went and bought jean skirts! I have no idea if or when I’ll buy any jeans (LOL I have to buy a larger size jeans than skirts- now that’s a deterrent!) or really cut my hair. (I have trimmed it, but not noticeably.) I don’t agree that those things are biblical issues, but they are just a part of who I am. On the other hand, this summer I fully intend to wear short sleeves, and look forward to showing my elbows.

One thing I realized, that had always held me back before, is that people “in the world” don’t generally recognize people as Pentecostal for the way that they dress. So however I dress is really just my preference, and doesn’t prohibit me from dancing or buying a drink or going to a movie… it was ingrained that everyone would know I was Pentecostal and doing something ‘bad’ would be a bad witness, but no one “in the world” cares what I wear or where I go. Now that’s liberating!

I really figured at first I would just leave the conservative churches and “go liberal.” But I’ve been to some of their churches now. So small, not growing… no single men my age… I want to meet and marry someone, and I get so mad at myself for sacrificing something so normal for a church that then inferred that there was something wrong with me because I hadn’t married or “backslid for a man.” That blew my mind. Fornicators were respected more than me because “at least they were normal.”

Anyway, back to the positive. Since leaving, I’ve been free to be happy, not to second guess every move, not to be afraid that I’d make a mistake… I didn’t have many friends left in Pentecost, and though it is good to reconnect with some I wasn’t allowed to talk to in conservative Pentecost, I don’t ever want to go back. Ever read Plato’s “The Cave“? Lots of symbolism, but a pretty good description of exit to me.

https://web.archive.org/web/20230521142750/http://www.historyguide.org/intellect/allegory.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allegory_of_the_Cave

There Are No Standard Standards

There are no standard standards. Though often touted as God’s rules or commands, people become perplexed when they go to another church within the same organization and find differences in these teachings. Though my experience with this involves the United Pentecostal Church, it happens in other organizations.

You may have simply visited another church and observed the differences or perhaps you switched churches and are a member at a new church. Maybe you have become involved in an online discussion group and notice vast differences. Same group, different churches….. and different standards? How can standards change from church to church within the same organization, when they are taught as originating with God and the Bible?

Something is taught as wrong in one, yet wrong and a sin at another, but OK in yet another. One teaches only skirts and dresses on women, another specifies how much below the knee they must be, and another allows pants underneath in cold weather. Pants? That abomination is allowed? I thought once an abomination, always an abomination? How can it be an abomination in one church and yet not considered such in the other?

One forbids members to own a television and yet says nothing about members watching YouTube videos on smart phones. Another states all non-religious movies are off limits but some pastors have DVD collections of the latest Hollywood films. One shouts that all jewelry is wrong, even wedding rings, and another allows rings, pins and brooches.

One says a woman shouldn’t cut her hair for any reason but it isn’t a sin and another says you lose protection for your family and are lost if you do. Some teach you can dye your hair and others claim it is a sin. One allows facial hair on men and another forbids it. One says no make-up at all, that you are a Jezebel, and another allows basic foundation and cover-up. One demands sleeve length to reach the wrist, another to the elbow and yet another is fine with it between the elbow and shoulder. And the list goes on….

Aargh! It is enough to make the head spin! How can so many with ‘the truth’ be teaching so many versions of these standards, especially when they state this is what God says. Is God confused? Does He change his mind all the time? Is something a sin in one area, but ten miles away it isn’t?

These are some of the questions people face when they encounter all the differences. It is no wonder that questioning the teachings often starts with standards. They are anything but standard in their churches. If they cannot agree among themselves and get these right, what else could they be teaching that is faulty?