Author: Nancy | Page 4 | Spiritual Abuse Blogs

God Is Love

My whole life from my first memories of God was a vision of Him as an angry, full of retribution God. I had fear of disappointing Him and paying dire consequences. ‘Be careful little, eyes, ears, mouth, etc. Because there’s a Father up above’. ( We got the looking down but the love part wasn’t emphasized and didn’t register).

As a PK, I heard all about the horrible things that happened to people who left ‘the truth’.

Of course horrible things happened to our church people too, and even to us but ‘wasn’t it lucky we were in the truth and God would see us through’!?!?!?!

Good things that happened to people outside the truth were because they were getting their only reward here on earth, but good things happened to us because God was blessing us for being good.

This 4th of July we celebrated freedom. The freedom of our country from tyranny. We also this year celebrated our freedom from ‘the truth’ which is not the truth but another Gospel of bondage that Christ died to give us grace to overcome. To be free in Christ is free indeed!

For we are saved by grace and that not of ourselves lest any should boast. God’s grace through Jesus Christ cannot be improved upon by feeble human rules and regulations. We do our best to be holy as He is holy but holiness is a matter of the heart and cannot be created by what we wear or don’t wear. Holiness comes from an honest heart filled with the love of God. Love the Lord with all your heart and love your neighbor as yourself, on these two commandments rest all the law.

A heart full of fear and judgement has no room for the love of God.

Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so!

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Works of faith

Faith without works is dead according to scripture so what are these works? Are they the clothing you put on (or don’t put on)? Are they the jewelry you do or do not wear? Are they your hair style?

Are they loving as Christ loved?
Are they praying without ceasing?
Are they sharing the Gospel of Christ’s redemption?
Are they having a spirit of forgiveness?
Are they believing in God’s love and plan for your life?

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen and without faith it is impossible to please Him.

The first list can certainly be performed without the need for faith in anything more substantial than our own human desires.

The second list requires faith in God, that He is and that he is a rewarder of them who diligently seek Him.

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Life after 60 outside the cult

Some won’t like that I said cult but I could have said asylum 🙂 ok, my apologies to the more serious among us.

Anyway, I am finding life to be very peaceful, rewarding, joyful, and surprisingly kind to me. No lightning strikes, fear, intimidation, etc. God is still good, kind, awesome, a source of strength and rest. His Word is still true and still hidden in my heart and slowly untwisting from years of cult manipulation. I find it easier to pray and sense a caring God listening with love instead of the harsh, threatening, far away God from the legalistic church.

I find it increasingly easier to trust God and to trust others; having faith in His love allows me to believe others truly love me and infuses me with love for others, friend and foe.

The spirit of judging, both myself and others, comparing, ranking spiritually on a ridiculous legalistic scale is a thing of the past.

An old children’s song says it all “Have faith, hope, and charity, that’s the way to live successfully, how do I know the Bible tells me so”.

So 60 is good. Out of the cult is good. God is good. My heart is full and I am in love with God, family, friends, life in general and even see the possibility of loving those that despitefully used me. God bless us one and all.

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Becoming

Is it ever too late to become? We chuckle and see TV commercials now of older people talking about what they want to be when they grow up but really once one loses hope of growth, the only thing that remains is death. Is that also true in the spiritual realm? I think Paul voiced that thought many times in many ways.

I feel that many times in my UPC walk, we were encouraged to see the 3 step doctrine as the be all and end all to our salvation. Sure we were told to then keep the ‘standards’ and behave ourselves but the only potential for growth was in service or giving.

In life though, growth or ‘becoming’ only truly stops at death, whether a physical death or a spiritual one. While serving others and giving to the cause is many times noble, it is only a small part of growth. To grow, one needs to stretch, to attain, to reach, and to experience anew. Paul called it reaching for the ‘high calling’ that is in Christ Jesus.

There is so much to reach for in understanding God, Christ, even ourselves and our becoming. God is limited when our only plan has three finite steps and discourages or minimally encourages further growth.

To grow in our relationship to God, one needs the freedom to think, to study, to listen, to realize one’s insignificance but also to realize the potential in living and growing in relationship to an almighty God.

“Study to show thyself approved, a workman that need not be ashamed” – paraphrase from Paul’s writings.

God is not limited to any belief system, any edition of His word, any group of believers, any man-made doctrine, any interpretation proclaimed by fallible humanity.

God is beyond our human understanding. It is a big mistake to ‘make God in our own image’. Like Paul, our goal should be to be ever coming to a knowledge of the the truth.

Jesus loves me THIS I KNOW, the rest is to be discovered as I become and grow until like Paul I can say I have fought the fight and run the race and look for that reward.

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Where Are The Dead?

This was a lesson title taught by SG Norris at ABI. I loved (and feared) SG and appreciated him immensely, but as the years have gone by and my losses have been many, I am realizing the arrogance of any of us to proclaim to know with any certainty ‘where are the dead’. Just as life is in God’s control –we can’t create it or even change it much– so death and the dead are also in God’s control.

I choose to believe a loving, omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent God whose mercy endureth forever, will not leave ANY of us nor forsake us even through our final journey. God is LOVE. I am forever thankful that we are in His hands and not in the hands of those on earth who would decide our destiny based on their limited, finite, self righteous understanding. There is shelter in His arms.

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