Author: Lois

This is for those interested in seeing the top ten read blogs from December 2016. (Omitted are any book giveaway postings.)

The blog section of the spiritual abuse website had 4508 visits, with 1733 being unique. At present, most of the referrals have still come from Facebook, Twitter and search engines.

If some who have similar blogs or websites would be so kind as to link to us, it would help increase our exposure. Also, sharing the blogs and/or commenting on them are also helpful and encourage the authors to continue posting. Many times the authors do not see the comments made on Facebook when the blogs are shared there.

Below are the top ten read posts for the month. Thanks so much to all our readers and authors! It is our hope that many more will be helped and encouraged by our blogs in 2017.

The Trial – author Susan.

Leaving – author Mary.

Merry Christmas – author Mary.

Who Understands Us? – author Lois.

Holiday Celebration – author Grace.

Leaving An Unhealthy Church #10: Sorting Through The Teachings – author Lois.

Tithing Food Stamp Money – author Lois.

Blue Christmas – author Through Grace.

Three Steps Part 3: The First Step – author Crabby Lioness.

Expulsion II – author Mary.

Previously I picked up a used copy of a book on the subject of rape (Telling by Patricia Weaver Francisco). It is a first hand account of a woman who was violated. Something she wrote in the prologue caught my attention, as similar can be said about spiritual abuse. Here is what she wrote:

“Myths,” said Cassandra Thomas in talking about rape, “keep us from doing the work we need to do based on truth.” And one of the myths we live by is that rape doesn’t exist. Not really. Not like baseball and heart attacks and love affairs and taxes. Not like the things we talk about together in the evening and feel the need to understand. We don’t talk about rape partly because we are bound by superstition. I couldn’t survive it. I might feel differently about sex. These myths keep women and men from having the conversations that might save our lives, our loves.

Substitute ‘spiritual abuse’ for ‘rape’ and see if you don’t see the similarity. There are definitely myths and misconceptions about spiritual abuse and it occurs with more frequency than many realize.

What are some myths and misconceptions about spiritual abuse that come to mind? One that I quickly thought of is those saying that people upset about the color of the paint or carpeting in a church are crying abuse, in an attempt to make the thought of abuse in church appear ridiculous and frivolous. While some misguided individual might proclaim this, in over two decades I have never had anyone contact me because they felt abused when the pastor had a church wall painted a color they didn’t want or like.

Another is that spiritual abuse is about people who are upset they didn’t get to do something, like teach Sunday School or sing in the choir. Or that it is some personal grudge about a matter. Again, the attempt is to make spiritual abuse seem frivolous and therefore discredit it, making people who have been abused to appear to be a bunch of whiners and complainers.