A UPC Minister’s Sexual Fantasy

Part two of a series of articles.

The call from West Virginia came one evening after 11:00 PM back in late 1993, not long before I made my exodus out of the United Pentecostal Church. He was a minister, having held license for at least a couple decades in the UPC, and ordination since at least the mid 70s. He was 27 years older than me and about eight years younger than my father.

Earlier that year after resigning my position in the church operated daycare center at the end of their summer program, I made a trip to visit him, his wife and his mother. By then we had known one another several years. He and his wife had become kind of like my second set of parents as we met not long after my mother passed away in the mid 1980s. They had come in search of work as he was a carpenter by trade and employment in WV was poor, while in New Jersey it was booming. All of us spent many hours together through the years, along with some other church members.

I’d been looking for a way to leave my church without it seeming obvious that I no longer wanted to be there and was considering the possibility of returning to West Virginia to help at his church in Mineral Wells. They were meeting in a trailer on the property at the time since the church was being built. In 1990 I had helped for several months at another small church in Vienna, so it wouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone if I returned to WV for a season. We discussed this possibility while I visited for a few weeks that fall, but no decision was made at the time.

Little did I know what was going to be disclosed when I answered that phone call. He shared with me that his wife wasn’t home and that she was not to know of our conversation. He proceeded to tell me that I had been a sexual fantasy of his and that it had been going on for awhile. He shared some things that he had fought in his mind. Needless to say, that conversation slammed the door shut to my returning to WV as we both decided that would not be a good idea.

The call ended and I never made another trip there. The beginning of the following year is when some things started to be said about the Lemons, that there was some type of problem. Sexual charges were filed against him, he was convicted and imprisoned and another minister, who was a trustee, took over Revival Tabernacle. In early May 1994, the Lemons deeded the property to the three church trustees, one being his mother.

I was in shock. He had never been inappropriate toward me. How do you process it when someone you saw as a father figure, tells you something like that? It is a creepy and disconcerting feeling. I didn’t share it with anyone at first. Because of that phone call, when the word came out he was in prison, I tended to believe he must have done something. If he had been fighting thoughts about me for awhile, he very well may have had them about others.

Clifford Lemon

For years I never knew the exact charges and to this day still don’t know much. From the little that was discovered online, in May 1994 Clifford Lee Lemon was convicted of 12 counts of sexual abuse by a parent, guardian, custodian or other person in position of trust to a child. I later saw a mention that in 1998 he appealed the denial of his petition for a writ of habeas corpus in his underlying conviction. To my knowledge he died on November 7, 2011, before ever being released.

I had contact with his wife afterward, but not much, and that stopped. It was very awkward because I didn’t know if he had disclosed to her what he told me and it certainly wasn’t something I wanted to discuss with her. She switched to a non-UPC Oneness Pentecostal church at some point after leaving and passed away on January 25, 2016.

Clifford Lemon obituary
Bernie Lemon

Prior to all of this happening, one of his sons was convicted in April of 1992 on three counts of 1st degree sexual assault where his victims were two minor female family members. Bernie (Bernard Eugene Lemon) spent more than ten years in prison. He would at times get to preach in different churches, but to my knowledge never held license. It was said by his parents that he did not commit the crime. I wrote Bernie for a little while after he was imprisoned but stopped when I became uncomfortable with something he wrote. I never saw him again after he was convicted.

Bernie Lemon

I well remember that the father could be hard with people when it came to following the UPC standards. He shared that women shouldn’t wear shirts with writing or pictures on them as it drew attention to their chest area. Once when I was visiting in West Virginia, one of his adult sons came over and had some facial stubble. He harped on it until the son went into the bathroom and shaved. One that I have never forgotten is how he viewed a child who was born out of wedlock. While he was by no means like some I have heard, I have come to realize through the years that some people who are hard nosed on standards often have something in their own life that they are hiding.

I wrote in the first article that I personally knew four men from the United Pentecostal Church who were convicted of sexual related charges. In an upcoming article, I will cover the other two.

Bernie Lemon’s latest picture- screenshot taken Feb. 2024

You will find a complete list of articles in this series by clicking here.

********
Shop at our Amazon store! As an Amazon Influencer, this website earns from qualifying purchases.

The United Pentecostal Church and Sexual Abuse

This is the first of a series.

It appears that one of the greatest temptations facing the ministry is sex. How does sexual purity relate to God’s requirements? Sexual immorality is clearly excluded by the requirements of ‘blameless, good report, good behaviour, just, holy, and husband of one wife.’ Again, a sexual sin is an obvious disqualification in light of all the Scriptures. ‘But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul. A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away’ (Proverbs 6:32-33). Even our sinful society acknowledges the truth in this verse to some degree, as exemplified by the public reaction to the Gary Hart and Jim Bakker scandals. Even people guilty of sexual sins often expect their leaders to uphold moral standards publicly, particularly religious leaders who claim to be morally pure. – David Bernard, January-March 1988 Forward (an exclusive publication for UPCI licensed ministers)

I am saddened once again as I continue to discover instances of wrongful sexual actions, committed against children and adults, by people in the United Pentecostal Church and elsewhere. My heart is grieved upon learning how some pastors failed to report cases to the police. In their attempts to handle these ‘in house’ and muzzle the victims, it has allowed people to continue molesting, causing untold damage and anguish to others. (One case in California, involving two UPC ministers who are still licensed, George Nobbs and Art Hodges, with the latter now serving as a General Executive Presbyter, prompted legislative changes.)

Through the years I have also heard stories of children of preachers never facing the consequences of sexual sins as their parent(s) covered it up and some were even later awarded ministerial license in the United Pentecostal Church. There have been ministers who have had affairs, leaving their spouse and children in their wake, trying to pick up the pieces of their once normal lives. There have been men and women who have suffered agonizing horror and shame as it is discovered that a spouse is a pedophile. Church members have had their faith shaken when light is shone upon a pastor’s sexual crimes, while others refuse to believe what they did. There have been victims of sexual violence who have been shamed, avoided, blamed and even kicked out of their church by fellow UPC members. They are told to forgive and to keep their mouths shut. Should they muster the courage to speak out, they are sometimes disbelieved and their character assassinated. It is all so very heartbreaking.

According to I Corinthians 6:15-18, sexual sins are against one’s own body. God has ordained that husband and wife become one flesh. Marriage is a holy institution and a type of Christ and the church. Sexual infidelity is a violation of the most basic, sacred, and intimate covenant that two people can make. Far from being a temporary lapse or indiscretion, it signals a fundamental breakdown of spirituality, character, and integrity- in relation to God, one’s closest loved ones, and oneself. The offender has broken faith and trust in the most important stewardship he has. This is doubly true when this sin has been committed repeatedly, as it often is. – David Bernard, January-March 1988 Forward

Before someone shouts that the United Pentecostal Church isn’t the only religious group where sexual abuse occurs or is covered up, I would have to have my head in the sand to be unaware of this. I also realize that their offenses are less in number than the Catholic church. I know that there are some ministers and churches that properly handle instances of sexual abuse. These facts, however, should never preclude the matter from being exposed and addressed. These facts can never diminish the devastation and life-long effects that the victims endure.

There is a focus on this particular organization as it is the one in which I used to belong. I personally know four men from the United Pentecostal Church, two of whom were licensed ministers, who were convicted of sexual related charges. In addition, there hasn’t been as much written about this group, or other Oneness Pentecostals, as has been with some other groups when it comes to sexual abuse. When some cases do hit the news, it isn’t always shown or openly known that someone in the UPCI is involved, even though their Manual stipulates any of their churches are to be clearly marked as such. (Article XVIII, Section 4:1 Identification “Each church that is either affiliated with the United Pentecostal Church International or is pastored by a minister who holds license or credentials with the United Pentecostal Church International shall identify by sign or otherwise on the outside of its church building that it is associated with the United Pentecostal Church International.” 2018 UPCI Manual)

A preacher may fall into sin, be forgiven by God, be restored to the church, and even be restored to many areas of service, but this does not automatically entitle him to his former position of leadership. He must once again meet the qualifications of being blameless, having a good report, and so on. This takes much time, and in some cases total restoration may never be possible. As an analogy, God will forgive a church treasurer who embezzles, but it may never be wise for him to fill that office again, for his sake and for others’ sake. The same is true of a Boy Scout leader who falls into homosexuality or a youth teacher who divorces his wife and marries one of his students. Moreover, some sins-such as child molestation, incest, and rape-may indicate deep personality problems that would permanently disqualify someone from many leadership positions. – David Bernard, January-March 1988 Forward

You may be surprised to realize that there is a very good chance that there are people in your church who have been molested at some point in their lives. Your closest friend, a co-worker, even your spouse or child may have never shared and could be suffering in silence. Some have been told by pastors to never speak about it and they feel they must be obedient. One must protect the church’s reputation. Some remain silent as they have seen how mistreated another was when they disclosed what happened. Due to how they were raised and/or what they were taught in church, they may at least partially blame themselves. They may have relationship, marital or sexual issues. And all this time they fight, struggle and suffer alone, right beside others, while most are oblivious to their pain. Sometimes they push through and openly share what happened. To me, that takes strength and courage, especially since there will always be those who dismiss or attempt to discredit the accounts, make excuses for the perpetrators, or make ignorant statements, such as questioning why they took so long to speak up.

Just as the church has authority to examine and approve ministerial candidates, so it has authority to remove someone from a ministerial position if he no longer meets God’s requirements. Actually the person disqualifies himself by his actions, and the church simply recognizes this fact. Solomon permanently removed Abiathar from the high priesthood, a hereditary role explicitly ordained by God, because of his rebellion (I Kings 2:26-27). – David Bernard, January-March 1988 Forward

There are questions in all of this that cry out to be addressed. If what David Bernard wrote is the official position of the United Pentecostal Church (and it should be as he has since become their General Superintendent), then why have certain things happened in some of their churches and ministers have obtained or retained their licenses?

How has anyone convicted of sexual crimes been allowed to participate in certain church activities and leadership has not informed the church members?

Why would any church that operates a school or daycare not tell the parents when one of their workers, past or present, has been arrested on charges of having thousands of images and videos of child pornography?

Why have pastors made the decision to handle any of these ‘in house,’ failed to report them to police, told church members not to go to the police, or covered them up?

Why have some pastors and District Superintendents not taken proper action when informed of such things? Shouldn’t a minister who fails to report sexual abuse lose their license as their actions allow a perpetrator to continue- are they not complicit in future assaults?

When a church has an atmosphere where some of the men had inappropriate interest in much younger female children, such as at Calvary Gospel Church in Madison, Wisconsin, how could this have continued for years and why have these children who were sexually assaulted received no justice?

Some may argue argue that Bernard didn’t say anything about taking church matters to the police or the courts. There is a mindset with many of these churches/ministers that believes these matters should be handled ‘in house’ – we don’t want to make the church look bad and we need to protect ‘the truth.’ The mission of the United Pentecostal Church in part is to carry “the whole gospel to the whole world.” They truly believe they have ‘the truth’ and that the vast majority of Christians do not have it and are not saved.

So I pose this thought: Shouldn’t an organization that believes they have the ‘whole gospel’ and ‘the truth’ conduct themselves better than other church groups? Shouldn’t they hold themselves to a higher standard than others? Shouldn’t they do whatever they can to protect and bring justice to those who have been sexually assaulted?

You will find a complete list of articles in this series by clicking here.

********
Shop at our Amazon store! As an Amazon Influencer, this website earns from qualifying purchases.

Top January 2018 Posts

In January 2018, the blog section of the spiritual abuse website had 9295 visits, with 5414 being unique. Below are the top ten read posts for January from six different authors.

We are always looking for new people to join our group of bloggers, so please consider registering and watch your email for more information. How frequently you post is up to you. Let your voice be heard and help others recover. You may find healing for yourself as well. Read here for more information.

Commenting directly on the blog is an encouragement to our writers as they often cannot see all the places where their words are shared and discussed on social media.

Not Everyone Who Is Friendly Is Your Friend – author John (accessed 641 times)

Coping with the Cults – Part #1 – Separation – author dividinghisword (accessed 622 times)

“Of Like Precious”…(Abuse?) – author Grace (accessed 397 times)

Toilet Training Your Emotions – author Grace (accessed 374 times)

Thoughts on The Body Keeps the Score – author Amy Renee Stangel & posted by Lois

Temperament’s Role in Spiritual Abuse – author Grace

Coping with the Cults – Part #2 – Judgmentalism – author dividinghisword

Leaving an Unhealthy Church #8: The Way Of The Transgressor Is Hard! – author Lois

Leaving an Unhealthy Church #9: Some Must Return To Remember Why They Left – author Lois

Taking every thought captive – author Through Grace

Thoughts on The Body Keeps the Score

In an online group, someone posted about the book, The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D. They shared how helpful it was for anyone who had been involved in a cult or unhealthy church environment. I am always looking to be able to share information on material that might help our readers, so I asked if anyone would be interested in writing an article about it for this blog. Amy Renee Stangel was one who responded and she submitted the following article in hopes that some might find help for their recovery.

**************************************

While I have never read The Body Keeps the Score, I know that the book’s basic premise is that experiences are “stored” within the body’s nervous system. The Christian counseling clinic where I receive treatment uses this book as a staple of its counseling practice.

The body functions in a very intelligent and self-aware way and will “know” things that can prevent brainwashing. As I was growing up and could feel my body being verbally punished through self-abusive religious doctrines, my body knew better and whispered: “You know better than this. You know that God is a good God and that you don’t have to be afraid in your body. You can trust your instincts that something about this is not right.” While I yielded to church and societal conditioning as a child, my memory of my body’s voice stayed buried along with that memory, but the memory came alive upon being unearthed in therapy.

The science behind the idea of “bodily wisdom” seemed at first to be dubious at best and unbibically pagan at worst (after all, I had been told growing up that you cannot trust your body and that it is an instrument of evil, a twisted version of what Paul said in Romans 7); but I could not deny the stream of memories, accompanied by literal releases of pent-up sensations in my body, that came to the surface in reverse chronological order after I began body-based trauma therapy. Many memories I was able to remember at least in the somewhat retrievable past, but many memories I also experienced through the filter of my nine-year-old self and had completely forgotten about for many years. Some have come from even earlier. In my body, I could sense the “knots” of memory that were intertwined with whatever real-time sensations they had been associated with. At times, I would completely re-experience what my personal reactions had been at the time when the memories had been stored. I literally re-experienced those thoughts and feelings.

While traumatic memories can be blocked off by the brain to protect a trauma victim, the body does not forget. Personally, I wonder if God set up this system as a record of truth to subvert systems of injustice and abuse and bring justice to those who need it.

If you are considering trauma therapy (such as EMDR) that may release these stored memories, make sure that you have an adequate support system for your own safety during the process. Although not many people can easily understand our experiences, do what you can to build the best support network you can. My traumatic memories have felt extremely overwhelming at times, and I have needed all of my resources to face them safely. (One time, I had a fully-fledged meltdown and needed to leave work; and the fact that my husband could listen on the phone while I spewed terrified profanity and freaked out…he saved my life because he was available, he listened, he understood, and he was authentically there and didn’t require me to censor myself. I experienced that memory in the context of no longer feeling alone.) My therapist has been on call, and my dad has also been available to listen so that I can feel supported. I have also sought out Facebook groups of those similar to myself for support; not just to process my traumatic experiences, but in order to help me make sense of my life and make sense of my total existence. (We’ll need to reorder the pieces of ourselves left outside of a cult in order to re-knit together the tapestries of our identities. Because of my social anxiety, online groups have been instrumental in allowing me to communicate on my own terms.)

I wish everyone the very best in their journey of healing. This therapy, along with knowledge of comprehensive mental health principles, has completely thrown open the doors of my potential; my life is beginning to make sense for the first time.

Read excerpts from the book here.

********
Shop at our Amazon store! As an Amazon Influencer, this website earns from qualifying purchases.

Top December 2017 Posts

In December 2017, the blog section of the spiritual abuse website had 9882 visits, with 6047 being unique. Below are the top ten read posts for December from seven different authors.

We are always looking for new people to join our group of bloggers, so please consider registering and watch your email for more information. How frequently you post is up to you. Let your voice be heard and help others recover. You may find healing for yourself as well. Read here for more information.

Commenting directly on the blog is an encouragement to our writers as they often cannot see all the places where their words are shared and discussed on social media.

Woman ‘in the Spirit’ on a Jamaican Flight – author Lois (accessed 1738 times)
Religion or Christ? – author Nancy (accessed 531 times)

She’s Got The Look (Of Salvation) – author John (accessed 432 times)

When you’re an “Apostate” in their eyes – author ThereIsLife (accessed 426 times)

22 Similarities In Christian Cults – author D.M. & posted by Lois

Living for God should not be so hard – author Random Thoughts

The Few, The Proud, The… – author Lois

Are you taught to keep the Law of Moses (Legalism) – author dividinghisword

Leaving An Unhealthy Church #1: You and Those Who Remain – author Lois

Stress. Anxiety. Depression. – author Random Thoughts

********
Shop at our Amazon store! As an Amazon Influencer, this website earns from qualifying purchases.

Click to access the login or register cheese
YouTube
YouTube
Set Youtube Channel ID
x  Powerful Protection for WordPress, from Shield Security
This Site Is Protected By
ShieldPRO