Hearing God After Spiritual Abuse

My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me. John 10:27

Wow, God seemed to talk a lot to my leaders in my Christian cult! Shockingly, His divine messages seemed to focus on how I missed it, again, and how I needed to be better in every way before He could use me at all. On top of that, God apparently had a lot to say about every aspect of my life, including where I was allowed to apply for a student job (unfortunately “He gave” to each of the two leaders contrary words of wisdom), how long I could attend work meetings, or when I was allowed to visit with friends and family.

Looking back, I can’t tell the flags from all the red anymore but back then I swallowed it all in whole. Needless to say that when my years in the cult were over, I desired to find truth. For years I carried crippling fears with me, fearing I would take the wrong turn in life and even committing to a vacation, buying tickets, etc. caused severe anxiety. What if God would cancel my plans last minute like “He” had done so many times before?

In this video I am sitting down with David Johnson, author of “The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse,” and we’re candidly discussing how a person can develop from carrying a sheep-mentality to a child of God-sheep, following the voice of the good shepherd. We are called to follow someone and it turns out, it will not be a person in front of us but a voice that can be found on the inside originating from God. If we hand over the responsibility of and for our lives to someone else out of fear to make a mistake and displease God, boy what a loss and misunderstanding of the grace of God working in our lives!

Disclaimer; we have no quick answers or fixes, all we came up with is that it will take time and mature people to help us grow to get in touch with our true self, the place where God can connect with us, and it is all about His love for us and everyone else. I hope this will bless someone!

Bon voyage, fellow traveler!

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