As some of you know, I moved a year ago and again this year. Last time I never did really find a church, and this time I haven’t found anything yet either. After yet another really irritating situation (actually two) on Sunday, I’ve been thinking….
I’m bored with denominational churches. Not because there’s a lack of “anointing,” not because I miss the outward worship… truth be told, I was bored in FT, too -although whether or not there was much anointing in that is debatable -and even at conferences and camps (think day services, I’m not the only one who didn’t go because something else was more interesting, I think). The difference between FT and denominational churches, then, wasn’t anointing or outward worship or truth. What was the difference? Part of it was the fear of admitting that those supposedly “awesome,” “Holy Ghost filled” services were boring, and the lack of honesty or words to know they were boring… and the larger part may have been that I had the ability there to do something else if things got boring. So a Pentecostal service got boring? Try to figure out who the preacher is talking about. Get up and run the aisles, say amen, clap, dance, whatever. Think about what everyone will do after church. See what people are wearing. Watch the visitors. Start praying and moaning. Work yourself up.
It doesn’t work as well visiting denominational churches. And so I have time to think about how boring they are. Especially if they don’t have WiFi. (In WiFi churches I jump online and tune out for awhile.)
Christianity isn’t a compartmentalized institution. Following Jesus isn’t nice and neat and tidy. It’s actually a bit chaotic and a lot messy at times from our perspectives. There aren’t easy answers for everything. Some things don’t even have hard answers. But ‘churchianity’ doesn’t seem very willing to acknowledge that.
Does that mean we should give up on church? No, maybe not. But I do think it’s the reason church is frustrating to me.
I picked up a book last night that was in my ‘to read’ pile. I couldn’t put it down. The book described me, describes most of us. We’ve asked some hard questions and realized that what we’ve been told about the Bible and God doesn’t answer the questions and doesn’t even fit what we’ve seen in the Bible, and that church isn’t what we were told or expected.
So if you’re looking for a church and finding it frustrating to find one, please realize you’ve been through and done something most people in ‘churchianity’ have never dreamed of -you asked the questions, faced a decision on whether or not you would believe and what you would believe, sorted through a lot of bad teaching, and come out on the other side. And as a result, at least for me, I can’t just “do church” or “have church” anymore. Not without a few yawns and a little time on the internet, at least.
What really made me realize how bored I was:
Recently the church I went to had a nice, tidy three point sermon. I can’t remember what all the points were. The message was taken from James 2, but it only covered a couple verses and was very fluffy. Do this, do that, love Jesus, the end. *Yawn* I went from that to looking for a Sunday School class. I went to the first and asked what they were studying. The man I asked looked at me and said, “We’re all older here.” I went next door to the next class (both were for “mixed adults”) and asked the same thing. Two women told me they were all –I stopped them and said I didn’t ask WHO they were, but WHAT they were studying. They responded that they were all married. Huh???
So I did finally attend a class, though. And in that class, there was a lengthy discussion on whether we should give money to bums. I tuned out. I’ve had that discussion several times. I’ve looked into it myself, considered several perspectives, and arrived at conclusions. The discussion later turned toward whether God was biased for choosing Israel as His people. It wasn’t a “Let’s open the Bible and look into that” sort of thing. It was more of a “was not-was too!” type thing. Again, I tuned out. For awhile. Until they really started getting on my nerves and I looked up from the internet long enough to interject that we should keep in mind that the Bible was written by, for and about Israelites, but that didn’t mean that God didn’t have others serving him as well. Followed by deathly silence. I went back to the internet and they changed the subject.
So… I’m bored because I go sit inside a box with people who think inside even smaller boxes, but I’m still thinking outside the box, and even wondering why we’ve made the boxes at all.
I go to a denominational church which does the ‘power-point’ type of sermon with no real bible emphasis. It’s not a bad church & there’s a lot going on missionally. However, I’m bored – like out of my mind I-want-to-scream-at-the-top-of-my-lungs kind of bored. There”s no reverence for God – it”s just 3 trendy worship songs in a concert-sized auditorium followed by a months ahead planned sermon. I totally get what you are feeling. I feel it too. Is this as good as it gets? Have we reached Oz and found it to be terribly disappointing? At this point I would rather visit a Catholic or Lutheran church, which is more liturgical.
Oz isn’t what it’s cracked up to be, is it?
There are good churches out there. I visited a terrific Catholic Church a few times. His were some of the best sermons I’ve ever heard… and for someone who went to church 3-4 times a week for 19 years, that’s saying a lot. The liturgy itself never really impacted me much, but I know others who find a lot of comfort and healing in it.
Sometimes I think maybe all the different denominations aren’t because “I’m right and they’re wrong,” but because God is multi-faceted, and each type of church reflects a different facet and touches different people. And then I see so much of the smoke and lights, entertainment, three songs and a canned sermon stuff… and wonder if most ‘church’ has anything to do with God at all.
I was totally bored with church too! I was a Pentecostal pastors wife but I felt more like a cheerleader without the pom poms!! Always trying to keep the worship going because that was my “orders” from the pastor. After my divorce I moved and began attending another Pentecostal church and their worship leader had the job of cheerleading. I was so bored and tired of the same 5 messages: Worship til you speak in tongues, Do your part to support the “work” of the Lord, Don’t forget to pay your tithes, There’s work to be done in the house of God and what you wear Ladies mean how much you love God. So I stopped attending church altogether and I wasn’t missed for about 4 weeks. Then I received one phone call from the pastor….”We missed you last Sunday…”. When I told him I hadn’t been there for 4 sundays and it was probably my tithes that I wasn’t paying the reason for the call. He stuttered and tried to make an excuse but I told him I was looking for another church and hung up. It took my daughter and I six months to find a great church. That was six years ago and we are still attending this church. Interesting and thought provoking sermons, bible studies that have taught me more in six years than I ever learned in 30 years of Pentecostalism and the people are very happy and sincere. So there are churches out there that are good and inspiring. Don’t give up on your search God has a place that won’t be in a boring box.