Leaving Church

Over the past few years, I’ve looked at several of the various oddities within this church, the conservative movement I was a part of, and Pentecost as a whole. No one would answer my questions for a long time. The answer was always to go ask the pastor. When I asked the pastor I was told that I was rebellious or thought I was smarter than him. I was expected to accept what was preached as gospel, and never look to the gospel or the God of the gospel for answers beyond the pulpit.

I hope these are anomalies- that they are not common in Pentecost. But the more I have read, the more I realize that I’m not alone in my experiences.

For a long time I refused to consider leaving the church, because they preached Jesus name baptism, Holy Ghost, and holiness of dress. But questions about other teachings started creeping into my mind. After two separate incidents, a year apart, when I was accused and charged guilty of something without being given a chance to explain (or in the second case to even know what they were talking about), I started looking into the scriptures more thoroughly. I stopped reading the Bible, but if something seemed strange, I’d reference the passage and read it in several versions if need be.

Several things began to disturb me:

  • The belief that the pastor was always right, and that he could not be questioned.
  • The concept that if the pastor said to do something, it must be done.
  • Preference of one person over another.
  • Letting down on standards held for decades, while still arguing that others (who used the same reasons for letting down on other things) were wrong.
  • Making women lesser saints.
  • Not allowing women to be as involved.
  • Catch phrases that demanded a shout.
  • Rebukes for not shouting on catch phrases, or not shouting enough.
  • Meaningless songs with a few words repeated over and over and over and…

It’s sad, really. I didn’t want to leave, and I never thought I would stop believing certain things. I’ve wondered if I would have been better off if I’d left months or years ago when the problems started. I miss my church friends, but there weren’t that many of them. I miss church activities to a degree. But I’m not sad to leave.

I wonder what will happen now, where I’ll go or what I’ll do. Will there be a church I feel comfortable in? Where? When? Should I take time off from church or plow back into it? Should I go to a Oneness church or just let that go? Will I ever be able to marry now that I’ve left? Will I put too much emphasis on a new pastor, following the old, ingrained rules?

There are no answers to these questions, but I’m satisfied. At first after leaving I crammed on books about exit and spiritual abuse. I don’t feel like doing that now. Maybe I should- I’ve been told it takes years to work through the problems. Maybe I just wasn’t treated that badly, or maybe its just that somewhere I still believe that I’m not leaving God just because I walk out the doors of a particular church.

In that particular way, I feel miles ahead of the ministers and saints I’ve talked to. Almost all of them think I need a pastor and need this church. Not so. I need God. And my pastor is not my god, and my church is not my god. My God fills the universe, but also stepped into time and was crucified to a cross… and rose again. His grace is sufficient, and I’ll trust Him.

Informational post on speaking in tongues #6

This is just a little ‘did you know’ informational post on the subject of speaking in tongues, shared as some food for thought.

When it comes to speaking in tongues, have you ever considered how things were in the New Testament times?

As mentioned in my previous blog, there are only three instances in the entire book of Acts where it is said that believers spoke in tongues.

Consider that none of those who are recorded in Acts as speaking in tongues had been previously taught about the subject. They were not instructed to expect to speak in another language. Not one person is seen as telling, or being told, that believers must/will/should speak in tongues. Do you find that to be in contrast with Pentecostal churches today?

Another interesting point to ponder is that you never hear of the believers in Acts speaking in tongues again after they initially did. I realize for some this is difficult to believe or grasp. Yet you will find no mention of Peter speaking in tongues a second time. There are no passages about Philip, John, James, Andrew, Thomas, Matthew or Mary speaking in tongues after the day of Pentecost. Cornelius, as well as his relatives and friends, are never observed as speaking in tongues again after Peter’s visit.

Is that not interesting considering the emphasis on tongues today? Either it never happened again with these Christians, or all the authors of the New Testament felt it was unimportant to mention. Does this not pique your interest and merit further thought?


Informational post on speaking in tongues #5

This is just a little ‘did you know’ informational post on the subject of speaking in tongues, shared as some food for thought.

Did you know that there are only three instances in the entire book of Acts where it is said that believers spoke in tongues? They are Acts 2, 10 and 19.  (Acts 8 cannot be included as it never once mentions tongues. More on this in another blog.) There are similarities in all three.

Have you ever considered the fact that when the people in these three instances spoke in tongues, they were not seeking or expecting to do so? They were not all even praying at the time. A group of people were involved in each situation. In two of the three cases, it clearly shows those speaking in tongues were magnifying and exalting God, telling of His mighty works, as they were understood by those nearby. (See the previous blog for the first instance.)

Acts 10:45-46:

  • The Jewish believers who came with Peter were amazed that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out on the Gentiles, too. For they heard them speaking in other tongues and praising God. NLT
  • All the circumcised believers who came with Peter were amazed, because the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out on the Gentiles also. For they were hearing them speaking with tongues and exalting God. NASB
  • The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astonished that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on Gentiles. For they heard them speaking in tongues and praising God. NIV
  • And they of the circumcision which believed were astonished, as many as came with Peter, because that on the Gentiles also was poured out the gift of the Holy Ghost. For they heard them speak with tongues, and magnify God. KJV


Informational post on speaking in tongues #4

This is just a little ‘did you know’ informational post on the subject of speaking in tongues, shared as some food for thought.

Did you realize that in Acts 2, the Bible only records about 120 people speaking in tongues? I know what many have been taught, but the Bible doesn’t say anyone else did on that day.

Acts 1:15 shows us that “a gathering of about one hundred and twenty persons was there together.” (NASB) There may have been more or less people when Pentecost actually came, however most Pentecostals use 120 as the number present. Verse 41 shows us that after Peter’s message, about 3,000 people became believers that same day and were water baptized. Yet there is not one word about them ever speaking in tongues. It is read into the text and assumed to have happened by those who believe all must/will/should speak in tongues.

Did you also realize that those who spoke in tongues on that day spoke about the mighty works of God? They were actual earthly known languages, understood by people from around the world who were gathered in Jerusalem. (see verses 7-11) There was no gibberish, repeated syllables or la-la-las such as we often hear today.

  • And they were all amazed and marvelled, saying one to another, Behold, are not all these which speak Galilaeans? And how hear we every man in our own tongue, wherein we were born? Parthians, and Medes, and Elamites, and the dwellers in Mesopotamia, and in Judaea, and Cappadocia, in Pontus, and Asia, Phrygia, and Pamphylia, in Egypt, and in the parts of Libya about Cyrene, and strangers of Rome, Jews and proselytes, Cretes and Arabians, we do hear them speak in our tongues the wonderful works of God. KJV
  • Utterly amazed, they asked: “Aren’t all these who are speaking Galileans? Then how is it that each of us hears them in our native language? Parthians, Medes and Elamites; residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the parts of Libya near Cyrene; visitors from Rome (both Jews and converts to Judaism); Cretans and Arabs—we hear them declaring the wonders of God in our own tongues!” NIV
  • They were amazed and astonished, saying, “Why, are not all these who are speaking Galileans? And how is it that we each hear them in our own language to which we were born? Parthians and Medes and Elamites, and residents of Mesopotamia, Judea and Cappadocia, Pontus and Asia, Phrygia and Pamphylia, Egypt and the districts of Libya around Cyrene, and visitors from Rome, both Jews and proselytes, Cretans and Arabs—we hear them in our own tongues speaking of the mighty deeds of God.” NASB
  • They were completely amazed. “How can this be?” they exclaimed. “These people are all from Galilee, and yet we hear them speaking in our own native languages! Here we are—Parthians, Medes, Elamites, people from Mesopotamia, Judea, Cappadocia, Pontus, the province of Asia, Phrygia, Pamphylia, Egypt, and the areas of Libya around Cyrene, visitors from Rome (both Jews and converts to Judaism), Cretans, and Arabs. And we all hear these people speaking in our own languages about the wonderful things God has done!” NLT


Informational post on speaking in tongues #3

This is just a little ‘did you know’ informational post on the subject of speaking in tongues, shared as some food for thought.

Did you know that the Apostle Paul shows that everyone will not speak in tongues? This is found in 1 Corinthians 12:29-30 where Paul asks a series of questions where the obvious answer is ‘no.’

Some people will tell you that you must speak in tongues or that all believers should. Oneness Pentecostals will say unless you speak in tongues, you are not saved as they claim it is the ‘initial evidence’ of receiving the Holy Spirit. These lines of thought are not found in scripture. The apostle Paul didn’t teach or believe it, nor did any of the other apostles.

  • All are not apostles, are they? All are not prophets, are they? All are not teachers, are they? All do not have gifts of healing, do they? All do not speak with tongues, do they? All do not interpret, do they? NASB
  •  Are we all apostles? Are we all prophets? Are we all teachers? Do we all have the power to do miracles? Do we all have the gift of healing? Do we all have the ability to speak in unknown languages? Do we all have the ability to interpret unknown languages? Of course not! NLT
  • Are all apostles? are all prophets? are all teachers? are all workers of miracles? Have all the gifts of healing? do all speak with tongues? do all interpret? KJV
  • Are all apostles? Are all prophets? Are all teachers? Do all work miracles? Do all have gifts of healing? Do all speak in tongues? Do all interpret? NIV


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