Don’t brag about your good deeds

Matthew 6:2-4 New Living Translation (NLT)

When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets to call attention to their acts of charity! I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get. But when you give to someone in need, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing. Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

Today it is so easy to let a lot of people know what you are doing or not doing. Just go to your Facebook account and start typing (or what ever social media site you use). Then the ones who receive your message may decide to share your good deed and everything else with all their friends. Pretty soon it has gone around the world in about 15 minutes.

I have seen posts like this: “I am going out to buy Christmas gifts for a family whose kids would not have any Christmas otherwise. Pray that I find lots of sales!!” Then almost immediately there are the responses: “Oh what a wonderful person you are!” “How nice of you to do that for that family!” “God bless you as you go out to find the right gifts!” and etcetera.

According to scripture (above) that is all the blessings and praise that person will receive. They won’t get a special jewel in their crown for telling everyone they know what they are doing. (“I tell you the truth, they have received all the reward they will ever get.”)

I don’t know why people are this way except they need to have praise from men (people in general). I think it is they don’t know what Jesus has to say about it (Matthew 6:2-4). I saw and heard of this happening, maybe not a lot, but enough times in my own former church that it just made me cringe. Even before I left. I don’t mind someone showing a gift they are buying for a special person in their life but to brag and call attention to buying for a family who cannot afford to buy for their kids is just against Bible Scripture. (“Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”) It does not or should not matter if anyone else knows you did this kind deed.

The Pharisees drew attention to themselves and would stop in the middle of the street and suddenly start to pray so they would get attention of those around them. In Pentecostalism this would be akin to suddenly bursting out in tongues in the middle of a busy mall or store. Just to get attention. Or jumping up in the middle of your place of work doing the same.  Jesus did not have kind words to those he called hypocrites. Would you not rather please Jesus than man?

By the way Jesus is very much easier to please than any man or woman on earth. And that is the Truth!

Book Giveaway!

We have given away books for years as part of the spiritualabuse.org ministry and this will be our sixth one via this new blog area. This is your chance to receive one or more free books on various issues.

The first people with a USA mailing address who respond will receive their choice of books at no charge to them. (Unfortunately, it is cost prohibitive to mail these books outside of the USA. Canadians with a USA mailing address are welcome to request books.) To respond, just leave a comment for this post. If you are unsure what any book is about, the links will take you to Amazon where you may read their description and reviews.

Up for grabs are several used books:

  1. One hardback copy of Choices by Melody Beattie. TAKEN
  2. One paperback copy of Facing Codependence by Pia Mellody. There is some underlining in the very beginning of the book. TAKEN
  3. Three paperback copies of Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. One copy has numerous pencil markings and another has some highlighting, but both are still very readable.
  4. One paperback copy of Recovery From Codependency by Dale & Juanita Ryan. TAKEN
  5. One hardback copy of How People Grow by Henry Cloud & John Townsend. It has a little highlighting.
  6. One paperback copy of Safe People by Henry Cloud & John Townsend.
  7. Three hardback copies of Boundaries by Henry Cloud & John Townsend. One has a little highlighting. ONE TAKEN
  8. One hardback copy of Boundaries  plus the paperback workbook by Henry Cloud & John Townsend. TAKEN
  9. Three hardback copies of When God Doesn’t Make Sense by James Dobson. ONE TAKEN
  10. One hardback and one paperback copy of The Jesus I Never Knew by Philip Yancey. TAKEN
  11. One hardback and one paperback copy of What’s So Amazing About Grace by Philip Yancey. TAKEN
  12. One hardback copy of Releasing The Bonds by Steven Hassan. TAKEN
  13. One hardback copy of Recovering From Churches That Abuse by Ronald Enroth. TAKEN
  14. One hardback copy of Boundaries With Teens by John Townsend.
  15. One hardback copy of Boundaries With Kids by Henry Cloud & John Townsend.

The first people with a USA mailing address who respond will receive their choice of book(s) at no charge to them. To respond, just leave a comment for this post. Please understand that comments require approval unless you have previously commented. So while it may look like you are first or second, there may be someone ahead of you whose comment is pending. Be sure to use your actual email address when setting up to comment as I will be contacting you through it. Check your spam folder as email sometimes goes there. (For your privacy, do not put the email or address in your actual comment.)

Be sure to mention in your comment which book(s) you would like and you may refer to them by number. There is no limit on how many you may request, though you may only have one copy of any title.

A little about fear, anger, jealousy and God

The Lord is my judge
When I have need of a savior
He maketh me to go through trials
He leadeth me through many tests…

No one, NO ONE, should misread the 23rd Psalm that way. How often it happens though! Sorry. Had to vent for a minute. We should never slander God by saying that, when bad things happen, God is testing or trying a person. If God made people do some of the bad things they do, in order to test or try someone else, He would be participant in their sin! And God DOES NOT SIN. Above that, He is righteous, and will not tell someone to do what He cannot- so He won’t tell someone to hate, lie, steal, cheat, slander, malign, rape, or murder someone else. The line of thinking that if something bad happens, “God won’t put on us more than we can bear” or “God is just testing you…” is totally, utterly against the word of God.

Anyway, so in reality:
The Lord is my SHEPHERD
I shall NOT WANT
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures
He leadeth me beside the still waters
He RESTORETH my soul

David was being chased by an angry, jealous king. He had done nothing wrong. He had, in fact, slain a giant and in doing so he had stopped the Philistines to a degree. He had played music to the king when he was troubled, to soothe his heart and mind. He sat at the king’s table and was his son’s best friend. But the king was angry and jealous of this young man. Then Samuel made it worse by anointing him to be king after Saul.

Saul was seething mad. David was sitting at the table with him, when Saul suddenly grabbed a javelin and threw it at him. No warning. Not exactly friendly territory, that king’s table!

Yet rather than fighting back, David ran. He left his home, his dad and brothers, and even his country. Did he discuss his problems involving the king? Sure. And there was nothing wrong with that. At what point did David draw the line in dealing with “God’s anointed” then? In deliberately physically harming him.

Later, the same thought is echoed when Saul died. David killed the man that killed Saul, again because Saul was “God’s anointed.” The man thought David would be glad. That angry, jealous, murderous old man was gone. But David mourned for Saul, and for Jonathan.

There are several odd things in the story of Saul and David. After all, David was mourning the man who sought to kill him. He wouldn’t “touch God’s anointed” even though Saul himself was trying to “touch” David, who was also anointed by God!

I wonder if that’s what made God call David the man after His own heart? That attitude of seeing what God wanted someone to be, rather than seeing their present condition and their faults? And I wonder if that’s why God gave mercy to David, a murderous and adulterous king, when he needed mercy? Because he showed mercy, he was shown mercy.

And maybe it goes beyond even that. Saul was angry. Saul wanted David dead because of the murder in his heart. David wanted Uriah dead because he was afraid. What a vast difference in attitude. Saul had a murderous, jealous, angry heart. He never sought repentance. David was afraid. God took his fear, showed it to him, and said, “Yes, I know.” David saw himself as he was, admitted his sin, and repented. God could use that kind of heart. Even with his sin, in spite of his fear, God could use a man who was humble enough to admit his failures, even though he was king.

A one way street

Half of the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm but the harm does not interest them. -T.S. Eliot, poet (26 Sep 1888-1965)

Substitute “church” for “world” and maybe “pastors” for “people” and you have what happens in an abusive/cult-like church. Maybe they don’t mean harm to others (some don’t and some do) but they don’t care about the harm done. I don’t think they even consider what harm their words or actions might be, but we as the congregation they preach to are expected to be very mindful to NOT harm the pastor or any of his family with our words or actions. Truly a one way street. They can beat us up verbally and spiritually but we are not allowed one word in question toward them.

God’s love

In my former church, the pastor emphasized that we can’t be “good enough” for God. I assume that what he meant was that we will never be able to “earn” salvation- it’s a gift. But his statement bothered me because of the way it was used.

Recently I went to a Christian comedian “concert” (Ken Davis). He told a story that his young granddaughter (under six) had gotten lost in the mountains while they were camping a few years ago. They searched for 3 1/2 hours, and couldn’t find her. Called in search and rescue. Nothing. A storm was coming in. He was in a panic, sure, after not finding her in all that time, that she would never be found alive. Then the call came- hikers found her over 2 miles from camp, sitting on a rock. When they brought her back to camp, someone snapped a picture of him talking to her. He was squatted down, holding both her hands, looking straight in her eyes. And he asked us what we thought he was telling her. “Don’t you ever do that again!” “How could you wander off like that!” “You know better!” No. All he could say, again and again, was “I love you, I love you, I love you.” And he asked how we could think God, who loves us so much more, could do any less.

On the way home, I kept thinking about that. There was very little ever said about the love of God in my former church. But His love is very real, and very near. We may not ever be “good enough” to earn salvation, but that’s because it’s free. And if that’s the case, none of us is “bad enough” to slip beyond God’s love and mercy either. We have more than a Savior. We have a Father who loves us more dearly than we can even understand. And I love Him, too.

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