A little about fear, anger, jealousy and God

The Lord is my judge
When I have need of a savior
He maketh me to go through trials
He leadeth me through many tests…

No one, NO ONE, should misread the 23rd Psalm that way. How often it happens though! Sorry. Had to vent for a minute. We should never slander God by saying that, when bad things happen, God is testing or trying a person. If God made people do some of the bad things they do, in order to test or try someone else, He would be participant in their sin! And God DOES NOT SIN. Above that, He is righteous, and will not tell someone to do what He cannot- so He won’t tell someone to hate, lie, steal, cheat, slander, malign, rape, or murder someone else. The line of thinking that if something bad happens, “God won’t put on us more than we can bear” or “God is just testing you…” is totally, utterly against the word of God.

Anyway, so in reality:
The Lord is my SHEPHERD
I shall NOT WANT
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures
He leadeth me beside the still waters
He RESTORETH my soul

David was being chased by an angry, jealous king. He had done nothing wrong. He had, in fact, slain a giant and in doing so he had stopped the Philistines to a degree. He had played music to the king when he was troubled, to soothe his heart and mind. He sat at the king’s table and was his son’s best friend. But the king was angry and jealous of this young man. Then Samuel made it worse by anointing him to be king after Saul.

Saul was seething mad. David was sitting at the table with him, when Saul suddenly grabbed a javelin and threw it at him. No warning. Not exactly friendly territory, that king’s table!

Yet rather than fighting back, David ran. He left his home, his dad and brothers, and even his country. Did he discuss his problems involving the king? Sure. And there was nothing wrong with that. At what point did David draw the line in dealing with “God’s anointed” then? In deliberately physically harming him.

Later, the same thought is echoed when Saul died. David killed the man that killed Saul, again because Saul was “God’s anointed.” The man thought David would be glad. That angry, jealous, murderous old man was gone. But David mourned for Saul, and for Jonathan.

There are several odd things in the story of Saul and David. After all, David was mourning the man who sought to kill him. He wouldn’t “touch God’s anointed” even though Saul himself was trying to “touch” David, who was also anointed by God!

I wonder if that’s what made God call David the man after His own heart? That attitude of seeing what God wanted someone to be, rather than seeing their present condition and their faults? And I wonder if that’s why God gave mercy to David, a murderous and adulterous king, when he needed mercy? Because he showed mercy, he was shown mercy.

And maybe it goes beyond even that. Saul was angry. Saul wanted David dead because of the murder in his heart. David wanted Uriah dead because he was afraid. What a vast difference in attitude. Saul had a murderous, jealous, angry heart. He never sought repentance. David was afraid. God took his fear, showed it to him, and said, “Yes, I know.” David saw himself as he was, admitted his sin, and repented. God could use that kind of heart. Even with his sin, in spite of his fear, God could use a man who was humble enough to admit his failures, even though he was king.

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Author: Mary

These writings cover many years, starting in 2009. Because of this, the time frame in individual posts may appear to be wrong and it may seem like things changed sooner than actually happened.

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